Destroyed Happiness
by eine.hexe
Summary: If you care about me, then you'll let me go - It was over.
1. Destroyed Happiness 1

**Destroyed happiness**

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Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha, and I do not make money off my stories.**  
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_**A/N: I felt like writing some angst. Now this is meant to be a one-shot, but I changed it.  
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**_Hmm, will I be flamed? Yes, there is always that possibility. Do I care? No, I do not. So go ahead, people. State your opinions :)_**

**_Italics show thoughts. You'll figure out whose._**

_**Enjoy.  
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She stiffened in the doorway. She couldn't bring herself to look at him. Not yet.

It hurt… an ounce too much. Her eyes felt numb and swollen and she could feel the tears rolling off her eyelashes, but she didn't care. They didn't burn, they didn't sting. Nothing hurt and ached like her soul did. And all because of him.

Was everything a lie? Had everything been nothing but a game to him?

_Who are you?_

She could hear his broken sobs even as he tried to be silent. A flash of anger shot through her body. Who was he to feel pain right now? He was the monster, the traitor. He was the liar.

_I don't know you anymore…_

Her mind swirled with countless images, likely situations. Were they lovers, as well? There was a high possibility. If he'd spent all his life lying, then who could ever believe him if he said nothing happened?

_You broke your vows…_

Her mind blistered and for once, she wished she couldn't remember anything from her life. She wished she could be a senseless doll.

_When will it stop hurting?_

But she knew… she knew they had to talk. She had to have closure.

Kagome had never been a sad person. Her life had always been filled with happiness and countless reasons to be joyful, even if sometimes things didn't look so promising. But her real happiness had begun when she'd met her husband, Inuyasha. But he wasn't her real husband, was he? She could barely believe that he would do such a thing, but it was clear as daylight that it was all true. His seemingly broken expression reeked of guilt.

"I just came to pick up my things," she said, her voice cracking under the weight of her own statement. If she knew this was the right thing to do, if she was positive it would be best for her, then why did it hurt so much?

She tried to push past him, but he grabbed her by the elbow and spun her around, forcing her eyes to lock with his.

"Please, baby, don't do this. Please," he cried, his eyes glistening with new tears. Her heart felt dull and her mind blank.

"Don't call me that," she hissed, shaking her arm out of his grip.

Intent on ignoring his apparently devastated demeanor, she grabbed her favorite suitcase and started packing her clothes. Tears trailed down her cheeks as she tried to sort her underwear, since they'd ended up sharing the underwear drawer over the years. She could feel his presence in the bedroom doorway. _Their_ bedroom. Their getaway… the place they'd used to escape the outside world more than once, the place that had witnessed every emotion they'd ever felt. The place that had had a taste of their innocent love and passion.

_What have you done to us?_

She didn't want to leave anything here, but she had to, since the suitcase wasn't big enough for all her clothes. She would have to send her brother Souta to pick up the rest of the clothes later. She couldn't come here again. Kagome wiped her nose with her sleeves, trying to stifle her unrelenting sobs. She couldn't hear Inuyasha crying, and that made her feel slightly better.

_You have no right…_

Why did he have to betray her like this? Why hadn't he entrusted her with his secrets? But with a secret so big, so important, how could she ever trust him again? The answer was so simple it hurt: she couldn't.

Apparently, Inuyasha decided he would have no more of this awkward, searing silence, since he dashed towards her and tried enveloping her in his protective embrace, failing when she jerked away.

"I was afraid of losing you," he said dejectedly, pleading for her to understand his reasons. Kagome shook her head miserably, laughing darkly with no trace of amusement.

"That's too bad," she said, her shoulders hardening, "because you did just that."

His pathetic whimper was audible, but she forced herself not to care. She shook her head, tears still clouding her vision.

She had to get this off his chest. She just had to. Only then would Kagome Taisho find the strength to become Kagome Higurashi once again. The thought hurt physically, but she had to do it. She couldn't do this to herself.

She gulped and turned to face him. He looked devastated, utterly destroyed and a pang of self-loathing hit her when she realized she was partly satisfied to see him like this.

_What are you doing to me? What have you _done_ to me?!_

She'd loved him for so long that she couldn't remember her life without him anymore. Her childhood, her teenage years, she couldn't remember those with clarity; they had become a simple blur. But now it hurt to remember him. To remember them. Sighing, Kagome realized there _was_ no them. Perhaps, there had never been.

"I love you," she said dismally, sniffling when his eyes widened just a fraction, "God only knows how much I love you. I can never love another like I love you…" He winced at the thought of _another_ in Kagome's life. In Kagome's arms. Possessing her like he had, loving her like he did.

"But…" she trailed off, turning her head to the side and stifling another round of hot tears and painful sobs. The three-letters word hurt so much that Inuyasha thought he would stop breathing. "This is not going to work," she concluded.

"Don't say that," he pleaded, taking a step towards her, feeling utterly helpless. "You still love me… we're going to make this work. I love you too, baby, more than you'll ever imagine," he confessed, his tears shining in the dim light.

To his immense horror, she shook her head and inched away.

"Baby…"

His voice was breaking, but she couldn't do this. She didn't have the strength to do this. As much as she'd always been his strength, his pillar that he always used to support himself, she couldn't find the will to help their relationship now. Their marriage was tumbling down and they were both aware of it now.

"Don't do this. Jesus… please don't do this," he kept begging, watching her rummage through drawers to get her most important things.

It wasn't easy. But it was like this. _'It's real life'_, she told herself. In real life, people sometimes walk away. In real life they don't always forgive. They don't always forget...

_I can't have my fairytale anymore. Not with you... but not without you, either._

"It's over," she said and he stared at her moving lips. Everything seemed in slow motion and he just knew he would remember this moment, these words for the rest of his pathetic life. It was over. She was right. And it was all his fault… if he hadn't been such a scared idiot, things would've been okay right now. They would have sorted this out together.

How many times had he told her he trusted her? How many times had he ensured her he would always tell her the truth?

Shame and guilt washed over him in merciless waves as he realized he'd lied. All those times when he'd thought he was being truthful, he'd lied.

_The one thing that mattered, I kept from her. I don't blame her…_

"I won't let you leave," he stated resolutely.

"I'm not asking you to let me leave, because that is going to happen anyway. I'm asking you to let me _go_." His breath caught in his throat as his eyes became infinitely wider. His heart pounding painfully inside his chest, his lips and chin twitched unnoticeably with the sobs he felt buried inside his throat.

"If you care about me," she said, her voice full of emotion, "if you're man enough, then you'll let me go."

And she left the room quickly, not daring to look behind, before he could bring himself out of his trance.

Completely defeated, Inuyasha let himself fall to his knees and cry his soul out. He wasn't anything without Kagome… without his sunshine, his love. His heart. The few fragments of sanity he had left told him to get over it told him to start anew. To forget her. If only it were that easy…

He wanted to forget it. The reason of this downfall. Kikyou…

He'd been a fool to think he could hide this from Kagome. When he'd met her, the love of his life, his reason to wake up in the mornings, Kagome, he was married to Kikyou, but things were going terrible and they had spoken about divorce more than once. Their feelings for each other had just faded away, unlike his undying love for this angel he himself crushed.

Tears poured on the hard wood floor as he recalled how scared he had been of Kagome finding out the truth. He hadn't wanted to lose her so he kept this secret hidden, but it eventually cost him his marriage. The entire life they'd built together came crumbling down with this single lie.

Just before he asked Kagome to marry him, he'd finally managed to divorce Kikyou. He remembered how outrageously happy he'd been when he'd got rid of her without Kagome finding out.

But now… now…

The events from the previous night would forever haunt him. He'd recently made love to his amazing wife when the door rang loudly in the middle of the night. For some God forsaken reason, he shrugged off the ominous feeling he experienced and let his wife answer the door, dressed in his T-shirt that was several sizes too big for her.

He heard the voices and dreaded facing his wife. It was Kikyou… Kikyou, his ex wife, in the middle of the night at their door.

As soon as Kagome opened the door, Kikyou firmly stated, "I want a divorce. Now."

He could only imagine Kagome's confused and hurt expression as her shaking voice called him. Reluctantly, he appeared before the two women, gulping when he saw his ex wife standing furiously in front of his current one.

"Who is she, Inuyasha?" Kagome's weak voice asked on that fateful night, her heart pleading for this to be a misunderstanding.

He didn't know what to do in the beginning. Admit everything or make it so it seemed Kikyou was crazy?

"Inuyasha, I want a divorce," said woman repeated.

It became agonizingly obvious that it was too late. He couldn't tell Kagome he didn't know this crazy bitch since she so obviously knew his name. He saw Kagome's hands start shaking furiously and instantly knew it was a bad sign.

"Baby," he said, his eyes showing her all she needed to know. He was sorry. So, so sorry… But Kikyou meant nothing.

On second thought… what did she mean she wanted a divorce?

Tearing his eyes off Kagome's, he looked at the scowling woman in the doorway.

"What do you mean?" he asked, not wanting to say her name. His voice was harsh, hostile, as he wanted to show Kagome he didn't care about this woman. Too bad she wasn't at all impressed.

"I want a divorce, Inuyasha. First thing in the morning."

Kagome's heart almost stopped when she heard this for the third time, the look in his eyes confirming his guilt. "You bastard," she hissed, throwing herself at him and hitting him senseless while crying. "You were married… all this time! you were... you BASTARD!"

"No, Kagome, let me explain. We're already divorced," he tried to explain as he dodged her blows, but she wouldn't hear it.

"We're not divorced," Kikyou corrected and both Inuyasha and Kagome stilled.

"What do you mean?" Inuyasha asked cautiously. Could it get any worse?

"I told you not to hire Kouga. That bastard," the woman hissed in anger. "The divorce papers are counterfeit. The whole divorce was a sham. You do something in a hurry and look what happens. You shouldn't have hurried like that four years ago," she admonished, remembering his inexplicable haste to divorce her. She had wanted to get rid of him too, but it was better to wait and do it all the way than do it in a rash and have it leading to this. "I want to get married," she explained, "but they won't accept it. They say the divorce papers are false. So hurry up and divorce me."

His heart dropped in his stomach as he watched Kagome's shocked face. She was shaking her head vigorously, perfectly impersonating a broken doll.

"Four years ago? We've known each other for five years…" Kagome's eyes filled with tears as realization shook her to the core. "You were married back then… oh, Gods… are you cheating on me too like you cheated on her?"

She was inconsolable as Kikyou decided to speak again.

"So, will you do it?"

Inuyasha forced himself to look at her and nodded. "So, you're getting married?" he asked slowly, his heart hurting for the broken angel that was crying her heart out next to him.

"Yes, you had your last chance two years ago," Kikyou answered without thinking, but the moment the words left her mouth and Inuyasha's eyes widened ridiculously, she knew it had been a mistake.

Kagome's head snapped up.

"Two years?!" she asked incredulously, her whole face scrunched in a frown.

"Y-yes," Kikyou said, almost embarrassed, unsure if it was her place to explain, "Inuyasha and I had lunch together once."

She didn't want to explain the seemingly broken woman that she'd regarded it as a date in the beginning, until Inuyasha told her of his new life. She realized there was probably nothing that could convince Kagome to stay with him now. Kikyou felt slightly guilty, but after all, it wasn't her fault. Inuyasha should have told Kagome the truth from the beginning, but he had always been a coward with these kinds of stuff.

Inuyasha flinched. "Baby, I can explain," he said.

Kagome shook her head as if to sort her thoughts and aching nerves.

"Really? Explain it to someone who cares," she said with a voice coated in venom, leaving the apartment in favor of wandering on the empty streets.

Now his whole life was shattered. Ruined. He had no reason to live.

It didn't matter that he hadn't cheated on Kagome, not even once. Nothing mattered, because he knew he was scum. He was worse than anyone because he broke a pure soul. Kagome's pure soul. Kagome, who'd never hurt anyone willingly. The calm and loving woman that had shown him what life and love meant.

_She's right… she will never be happy with me again… Above all things I want her to be happy…to always be happy…_

Closing his eyes brought some more pain, but he didn't care. He realized he did want her to be happy. If not with him, then by herself. _Or with another…_ The thought alone felt like a knife driving through his innards, but he purposefully ignored the ache.

_I'll let you go, my love…_


	2. Destroyed Happiness 2

**Destroyed happiness**

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Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha, and I do not make money off my stories.**  
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_**A/N: ****I'm anxious to see how you respond to this chapter :) Keep in mind that the next chapters ****may **__**surprise you. Also, I want to thank you for reviewing and telling me your opinion on whether or not you think I should write a second chapter. So here it is: the second chapter.**_

_**Honestly, I hadn't meant for it to be like this, but it just happened. It might be **__cliché__**, but it's MY version of a **__****__cliché__**, so...**_

_**Now I'm thinking of expanding it. Actually, I'm sure I'll write more than 3 chapters for it.  
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It was funny how days seemed to develop into weeks then into months that eventually became years. _Three _years.

The lake was as still and peaceful as it always had been, and Inuyasha was very grateful for that. He couldn't survive more drama, more anxiety. His heart had always been a frail thing, but now more than ever.

At least he couldn't cry anymore. Three years and his life had found a bit of peace at last. Even if it wasn't the kind of peace he had desperately wished for all this time, it was a tranquil serenity that had taken over everything of his life. But he couldn't call it peace. Not yet. There were still many steps to be taken, but he couldn't bring himself to do anything more than work and revisit this place that had been their sanctuary.

It was Sunday, and Sundays had always been the days he'd look forward to. He could clearly remember every single detail of his wife. His real wife. The one that had set him free.

Kagome…

They would spend their weekends together, doing nothing ore than loving each other in every way possible. It was something unbelievable, the chemistry between them. He'd felt it when he'd met her and had felt it every day spent together with her from that day.

Only now he wouldn't feel it anymore.

Sometimes, he wished for tears. He wanted to cry, to sob his soul out so he wouldn't hurt this much. But he'd already done that, countless times in the first two years. It was hard for him now; hard to be aware that he'd come to terms with this state of mind he was constantly in, but not with the situation. He wasn't glad, but he wasn't devastated, either. He just _was_. It was a neutral feeling, one that sometimes soothed him, sometimes destroyed him.

He hadn't even tried to make excuses for what he'd done, because it was something that just wasn't worthy of forgiveness.

Kikyou was married now and he was vaguely glad for her. He'd wronged her, too, and now she led a pleasant, happy life with the man she _really_ loved.

Listening to the wind whisper soothing nothingness, Inuyasha threw a pebble in the water and watched it turn into a ripple that grew and expanded, enveloping every fragment of serenity the lake possessed. It was all about undulating waves now, the stillness having become a thing of the past until it would all stop. Like a circle.

A circle that would never end. His pathetic life.

There were times when he wondered how it would be like when he died. He doubted his half brother would be present at his funeral, but then... who would be left to bury him?

He'd run away from his friends when his life had come tumbling down along with Kagome's departure and their divorce. Now it was all about work and this little cottage by the lake that brought him so many memories, bittersweet ones.

How his charming Kagome would wake up in the morning and find him in this same place, on the deck looking at the lake, and bring him a mug of hot chocolate. Their every vacation had been spent here, with as much happiness as two people could have.

Now it was only he who religiously came to the same cottage every weekend to reminisce the most blissful years of his life.

The world was beautiful and full of life, but without Kagome, nothing impressed him anymore. He remembered her awe whenever she saw a butterfly spread its wings, and he remembered his own amazement at the exchange between both pure creatures.

Anymore, there was nothing that made him tremble with wonder.

Kagome had moved on, that much he knew for certain. She was married. That's what her best friend had told him a year before.

For two years Ayumi had purposefully ignored him, and it had probably been for the best. He couldn't imagine her reaction if he'd talked to her sooner, because even after two years she'd seemed angry as hell.

He'd called her for the umpteenth time, in hopes of hearing something about Kagome. Anything.

She'd yelled at him and hung up, but he'd been relentless. He'd called her back again, and let her lash out at him, knowing that he deserved it.

Her voice had been strained and hoarse, quivering with suppressed ire, but her words had torn him apart. "Kagome is getting married with a man that loves her and will never hurt her," she'd told him grimly with an almost sadistic pleasure coating every uttered syllable. Then she'd hung up again, but he hadn't bothered calling her back this time.

That knowledge had broken the last pieces of his heart, and now it was all scattered throughout memory lane, the only place where he could be himself again.

She was remarried. His Kagome belonged to another man, a man who would give her the children she'd always wanted with _him_. The children he'd always wanted to have with her, as well.

That most lucky man would be blessed with the chance of having Kagome's unconditional love, feeling her heavenly body against him every night. Those images tormented Inuyasha, but he knew he deserved them. Deserved every moment of pain he had inflicted upon himself.

At first, he hadn't thought that what he'd done was that condemnable, but years of thinking and analyzing had made him see things in a different light. In the _right_ light.

Intentionally, Ayumi had hurt him in the worst possible way, but he could deal with it. For Kagome's happiness, he _would_ deal with it.

He wondered, did she love that man more than she'd loved him? Did they have children? Did that man know her ankles were most sensitive? Did he take good care of her?

Life wasn't paradise, it wasn't even pleasant; but then again, it wasn't supposed to.

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Kagome looked up at the sky and smiled. Her life had turned out to be unexpectedly sweet and enjoyable. The nightmare she'd lived for a while had turned into a fairy tale when her child had arrived into this world. The little girl was almost identical to her mother, and still so young… her little Aiko was her most precious treasure.

But there were grim times in her paradise, as well. Times when she wished she couldn't _feel_. Dreadful times when all she wanted was to be unable to remember.

It had been four years and it still hadn't gotten easier. It had just gotten more bearable. The pain Inuyasha had caused her had been dulled over the time, but it was still present, still nagging at the back of her mind whenever she had darker moments. But now she had a family. Whenever she was sad, her little Aiko would smile and she'd smile, as well.

Holding her umbrella, she rummaged through the bag with her free hand, desperate to pick up the phone that was blaring through her thoughts.

The raindrops drummed against the umbrella, but it felt like they were throbbing inside her mind, against her very brain cells. It was both soothing and frustrating.

Having grabbed the phone, she flipped it open and held it to her ear.

"Yes?"

She hurried, anxious to get home to Aiko. She never let her alone during weekends, it was like a ritual of theirs.

"Do you have any idea what time it is?"

Oh. She'd almost forgotten Ayumi had things to do, too. Kagome was often reluctant to let Ayumi take care of Aiko when she needed someone to. She loved her best friend dearly, but she seriously lacked patience.

"I'm coming, Ayumi. Wait just a few minutes. Why? Has something happened?"

Her nervousness was obvious, and Ayumi instantly got defensive.

"Calm down, girl. I can only say she's too damn tame. She should be trashing the apartment right now."

"I taught her well. If it had been your child, she would have set the place on fire by now," Kagome teased, knowing how horrified Ayumi was of having kids. One look at Aiko and she was already scrambling away from the whole concept.

"Tell Aiko mommy loves her," Kagome said with a docile voice, smiling warmly.

Her friend scoffed through the phone, "Pff… as if you don't tell her enough daily."

Kagome couldn't help but smile at the drastic turn the horrible events had taken. She was content now. Unpredictably, she had been given a second chance at happiness. She had everything she could possibly wish for in her situation. In her shoes, who _wouldn't_ think life was paradise?

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"Idiot," his half brother intoned, "do not ruin the dinner. Rin is here."

Sesshomaru was a pain in the ass. Sesshomaru was _always_ a pain in the ass. _He_ had invited Inuyasha for dinner, despite every protest the man had began to utter, and it was _he_ who was bitching now. What had he expected? That Inuyasha would come smiling and play with Rin just like old times?

He hadn't seen his niece for a few years and it was natural that she'd miss her favorite uncle (her only one, at that) but he couldn't help it. He wasn't in the mood for playing with kids, especially when he was aware that Kagome probably had some of her own.

Come to think of it, how was it that Sesshomaru had ended up adopting Rin anyway? On a daily basis, the almighty businessman acted like he hated all humans, never minding the fact that he was human, himself.

The girl ate silently, throwing occasional glances at Inuyasha, who was feeling guiltier and guiltier.

Sighing deeply, he stood up and coaxed Rin into showing him her new toys. It hadn't required much persuasion, since the girl was as willing as ever, and he'd resolutely ignored his brother's ever so solemn way of telling them they had not yet finished their food.

He was good with children, Kagome had told him that countless times while watching him interact with his niece, but now he'd never have the chance to play with his own child. He refused to see other women, despite the fact that he knew Kagome had chosen another life, one with another man.

The only woman he wanted was no longer available, so he just had to suck it up.

Smiling when Rin excitedly told him how she got her father to buy her the most expensive Barbie toy in town, Inuyasha felt slightly jealous of his older brother. That man was the ultimate prick, yet he had a child he obviously cared for. It didn't matter that he didn't have a woman by his side; the asshole didn't need one. He didn't _want_ one. Sesshomaru probably had countless chicks he fucked with no strings attached, but in the end, Rin would always give him all the love in the world.

Instead, Inuyasha had nothing of the sort. His only company was his own misery, who seemed to be quite attached to him.

Ruffling the girl's hair, he watched her pout cutely and wrinkle her nose.

"I spent hours on my hair, uncle. Stop that," she whined, trying to get her childish hairdo, which consisted of two very asymmetrical pigtails. Rin was probably a bit too childish for her age, but he couldn't blame her. And even though she was spoiled beyond reason, she wasn't a bad girl. She was as obedient as someone would ever want their child to be, without seeming traumatized.

Perhaps over the years the pain would go away. Maybe he could find his utter peace.

Maybe Miroku would teach him how to meditate.

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Her daily schedule was pretty simple: go to work, work, come back from work, and spend time with her family.

Kagome had managed to get a job that didn't keep her from spending some good hours at home, or better said, in the park, her daughter's favorite place in the 'whole, wide world'.

Aiko was four already, and she was very active. In other words, she was normal. She didn't know what pain was, and if Kagome had any say in it, she never would.

She quickly scanned the area and was satisfied to see it was safe for Aiko to play in the sand there.

"Mommy, I want to see Aunt Ayumi later."

Kagome chuckled in amusement. Ayumi played her part well in front of Aiko, but truth was, she wasn't at all into kids. To bring Aiko to her daily would be torture for her best friend.

"Sorry honey, Aunt Ayumi has stuff to do and we can't disturb her."

It was an innocent lie, not at all like Inuyasha's lie had been. His had stretched and spread into something too big to be left unnoticed. Too great to be forgiven. As deep as her love for him had been, she hadn't been able to find it in her to forgive him. For all she knew, he could have been screwing Kikyou all that time.

She'd seen Kikyou two years before. She was married and happy. She couldn't have children, but that didn't stop her from adopting two beautiful twins. The woman wasn't unpleasant to be around, and Kagome vaguely wondered what it was Inuyasha had seen in her and not in Kikyou. Maybe it was her ability to drive him mad at times? She knew that had been a terrible turn on for him.

And how was his life? The first and last time she'd tried to talk to him after their divorce had been after a year, but he'd been nowhere to be found. Maybe he moved away. Away from her, away from his world.

Maybe he was married now. Or perhaps he didn't even bother to get married again, what with where doing that twice brought him. Maybe his new wife gave him children, and maybe, _maybe_ they were happy together. A big, happy _family_. She cringed for just an instant.

There was so much Kagome didn't know, but there was also a great deal of things she didn't _want_ to know. She was just content to wonder.

* * *

"I told you I'd pick up Rin from school. What do you think I am, an idiot?" Inuyasha yelled through the phone, annoyed that his brother didn't think he'd remember to pick up his own niece when he'd promised.

"You should never ask me rhetorical questions, brother, or I will be inclined to answer and you may not like it," the stoic businessman replied, no trace of emotion in his words.

"Yeah, well, I love you too dickhead," Inuyasha muttered through the speaker, loud enough for his brother to hear.

"You had better not talk like this in front of my daughter, otherwise I will make sure you won't ever be able to say such words again. In fact, I will make sure you will never be able to say _any_ words again."

The empty threat didn't faze Inuyasha at all. He was used to it. And it even seemed that after so many years he was finally on the right side of the path to a pleasant life. A life without hurtful thoughts. He was starting to cope with his pain, and it was relieving. It showed in the way he acted, and his brother had told him as much, which had surprised him a great deal. Sesshomaru was not one to show emotions, except in front of his own daughter when they were alone, but he'd told Inuyasha he was glad to see him improving.

"If you are a minute late, you know what to expect," Sesshomaru stated before hanging up.

Annoyed, Inuyasha increased his steps. He would be early, but at least he'd make sure he'd have time to spot Rin when she came out.

The sidewalks were always crowded, but something made him stop dead in his tracks.

A few feet in front of him was Kagome. Kagome, his ex wife. Kagome, the woman he still loved more than his own life. And Kagome had a daughter.

There was no trace of a doubt. That little child whose hand Kagome held and who kept tugging at her sleeves was Kagome's. Same eyes, same hair color… same cute nose.

A sharp pain shot through him and almost brought him to his knees. His first reaction was to try and walk away from the sight, but something kept him still. He watched Kagome's trademark roll of the eyes as they both stopped to buy an ice-cream.

She had a child. Kagome had a child… a girl. She'd always wanted a girl, he could remember. And whoever the lucky bastard was, he'd given her one.

After paying, the still gorgeous woman crouched next to her daughter and refused to give her the ice-cream until she'd receive a kiss. It didn't take long, however, until the cute girl placed a sloppy kiss on her mother's cheek then hurried to grab the ice-cream and devour it.

Kagome's smile was brilliant and it did funny things to Inuyasha's stomach. He could clearly remember when she would smile at him with such love and adoration.

Lowering his gaze, he thrust his hands in his pockets and started walking, hoping she wouldn't see him or recognize him. After all, he'd changed many things about his appearance. His hair was short now, unlike the shoulder blades-long hair he'd used to have on Kagome's constant persistence, and he was skinnier.

Not daring to raise his gaze and see how happy she was even though that was what he wanted for her, he tried to occupy his mind with thoughts of Rin and what to buy her for her upcoming birthday.

However, a familiar, sweet noise reached his ears as he pushed past his love and managed to halt his actions.

"Inu…yasha?"

Her voice had been so meek that he wondered how he was able to hear it, but he knew. He knew that no matter what, he was most aware of her. After all, she was his half. But the thing was, he wasn't hers anymore.

Turning around ever so slowly, he inspected her widened eyes and the curious gaze of the angel holding her hand.

Stuttering and seemingly afraid of something, Kagome introduced her daughter, Aiko.

He smiled at the girl; she was charming, as her mother was. Even though he knew that in other circumstances he would have been jealous of this adorable girl, he couldn't help but like her very much. If she was anything like her mother, then she would surely grow up to be a brilliant woman.

For just an instant, he wished _he_ could be the girl's father and at Kagome's side.

"It's… nice to see you. To see you've moved on," he said awkwardly, desperately trying to avoid scratching his nape as was his custom when he felt uncomfortable, so she wouldn't know it. But he knew it was useless, because she knew him better than that. But the question was, did she still know him? Had she forgotten him? Had she _forgiven_ him?

'_Probably not.'_

Kagome's eyes shot down to her daughter, then back up at him. The action had been so fast he'd been an instant away from missing it.

"Oh," she said, her voice low and… nervous? Well, she had every reason to be nervous.

"We don't have to do this," he said slowly, the unmistakable sign of something wet pricking at the corners of his eyes. Of all the times to cry… _'Why the Hell now?'_

Desperate not to let her see it, he averted his eyes and breathed deeply. He hadn't cried in ages; the pain had been somewhat dulled, but now everything came back. The torment, the anguish. He couldn't stand it. Especially here, with the living proof that Kagome had indeed moved on.

"Goodbye, Kagome," he said with a low voice and turned to leave.

"Wait," she shouted after him, making him stop once more.

He heard her heels on the sidewalk. She was walking towards him, the girl in tow. Kagome loved high heels, and she was as gracious as a mermaid in them.

"How are _you_?" she asked, and there could be no misunderstanding. She wanted to know what his life was like now.

He wanted to tell her he was devastated, he wanted to let her know how much he missed her and how empty he was without her. He wanted to tell her he'd never be able to move on, but he couldn't. He wouldn't. Instead, he'd make her believe he was okay.

Inuyasha knew Kagome. Even if she didn't still love him, there was no way she wanted something bad to happen to him. She just didn't want him in her life anymore.

"I'm…" He stopped, not knowing what word to use. Okay? That would make her believe he was lying. Spectacular? Pff, too damn cheesy. "…great."

He turned around, watching her doubtful expression and knew she was having a hard time deciding if he was lying or not. Apparently, he had been convincing enough that she let it drop. He continued, hoping to offer a subject they could approach.

"I was just going to school to pick up…"

"Oh," Kagome interrupted, her gaze connecting with the ground.

"No, let me finish. To pick up my niece."

Her eyes connected with his, hopeful, smiling. "Rin?"

"Yes," he replied with a nod.

"How is she? How is Sesshomaru?"

"Never better," he told her with a smile of his own. It was true. His niece was turning out to be a wonderful girl, and Sesshomaru had mellowed a bit. Only a tiny bit, but it was still surprising.

"I'm glad," she said warmly.

He noticed Aiko was very quiet. Maybe she didn't feel comfortable around strangers, or maybe she didn't like the fact that a man that wasn't her father was talking to her mother like he knew her inside-out.

"I'd better go," Inuyasha said, "or else Sesshomaru will have my head. I'm supposed to bring Rin home on time."

"Oh," he heard Kagome say, but he couldn't tell if that was disappointment he could hear in her voice. "In that case…" She let her words hang in the air between them.

"Yeah… Goodbye Kagome, bye Aiko," he said, his voice sounding funny even to him.

Not waiting for them to respond since he could feel his tears resurfacing, Inuyasha crossed the street and wished he was dead.

'_Aiko… love child… so Kagome is happy and has found love once again. I'm… glad for her.'_


	3. Destroyed Happiness 3

**Destroyed happiness**

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Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha, and I do not make money off my stories.**  
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_**A/N: Okay, here it is: chapter 3. I hope you'll like it. I bet most of you have already seen this coming, but still; I'm hoping my story is still unique... in its own way... even though I'm sure many writers have written about a similar thing.**_

_**Well... enjoy :)  
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No; half a bottle of vodka just wouldn't cut it.

Slamming the empty bottle against the wall, Inuyasha briefly wondered where all this anger came from. It wasn't like he didn't deserve what he got, but he couldn't help thinking that maybe, _maybe_ Kagome had overreacted. In his mind, she could have at least let him explain.

Where had her trust gone?

The alcohol hadn't gotten to his head yet as Inuyasha wanted, so he'd just have to go to the bar.

Trying to keep his anger in check, the devastated man picked up his keys from the floor and left the apartment, not caring that he was supposed to be at Sesshomaru's for dinner. Rin could wait. After all, the asshole had three women hired to take care of his daughter when he was away.

Reaching the bar that was so close to his home, he quickly ordered a shot of whisky. Clutching his head in his hands, Inuyasha tried to contain his frustration for the umpteenth time that day. Kagome had a daughter and a whole new life without him. He'd known this for quite some time, but the concept was only now beginning to settle in his brain and wreak havoc.

Somehow, he felt it wasn't fair. He'd loved her from the moment he'd clapped eyes on her and he knew she'd been in love with him, too. They were perfect for each other; he still felt every inch of that attraction he'd experienced years before. It just wasn't fair.

He was so engrossed in his musings and drinking that he didn't feel a distinctively feminine hand touch his thigh suggestively. Only when she squeezed to emphasize her point did he gaze up at her.

The woman was quite beautiful. Her long, black hair with blue highlights really made her deep, blue eyes and matching make-up stand out. She was dressed to incite, but he was left wondering why he didn't feel the distinctive stirrings in his blood. Was it because of his ex wife? Scanning her sourly, Inuyasha decided he liked the calf-length stiletto-heeled boots that matched her rather short leather skirt. And her perfect, rosy lips were so _kissable_. But she wasn't Kagome.

Scrunching his nose, Inuyasha made a point of ignoring her. He didn't have time for this shit tonight. He was sick and tired of refusing advances, and the fact that he was already a bit hazy didn't sit well in his stomach. What if he did something stupid from not being sober? The only thing he wanted was some peace and quiet to reflect on his pathetic life that was speedily going downhill.

But the woman was apparently relentless.

"Hey, gorgeous," she said huskily, licking her pouting lips and then flashing him a bright smile that would have turned his world upside-down had the situation been different. "Have I told you about my plans of conquering the world?" she asked, her eyes twinkling with mischief.

Sighing unnoticeably, Inuyasha downed the remaining whisky in a smooth motion, appreciating the way it scorched his neck on the way in.

Turning his vague attention back on the seductive woman, he didn't show much interest. "So you're what, a model or something?"

He was sure she could see he was not interested, but figured that maybe it was a challenge for her. "No, honey," she answered slowly, hoarsely, "I'm THE model." Her statement was punctuated by her hand on his crotch and the whisper of her name dangerously close to his ear… "Kaguya."

* * *

Kagome groaned out loud. She wasn't in the mood for this, but she couldn't have said no. She hadn't spent much quality time with her best friend and Ayumi had thrown that into her face so, naturally, she couldn't refuse coming to her best friend's favorite club.

Groaning again in annoyance, Kagome watched Ayumi make a fool out of herself on the dance floor. Whenever she got a little tipsy, Ayumi would dance wildly with the first man she saw. This wasn't an exception. True, this Bankotsu person was a lot nicer and smarter than any other guys Ayumi had been around, but Kagome wanted to make sure he wouldn't take advantage of the girl's state.

Unexpectedly, Ayumi showed up in front of her grinning widely.

"Say, _Kags_," she drawled, gesturing towards the smirking Bankotsu as Kagome grunted at the nickname she'd been given, "can you do us a favor? I really, _really_ wanna dance some more and Bankotsu has to deliver something to the bar across the street. Can you do that for us instead?" she asked sweetly, making Kagome roll her eyes.

'_Sure… why not? Send Kagome... she'll do the dirty job! Stupid idiots!'_

Smiling herself, Kagome pretended not to care. "Yeah, 'f course. Just tell me who to go to."

Ayumi squealed excitedly and kissed her friend messily on the cheek leaving a small, wrapped package on the table. "Just leave it to the bartender," she said, emptying Kagome's cocktail from the table then hurrying back to her dancing date.

Kagome didn't waste any more time watching the two grind their pelvises against each other and crossed the street hastily, frantic to get the job done.

The moment she entered the bar she wondered if it was an exclusive one or something. The music was quite low and there were very few people inside. But what made her breath stop and her knees grow weak was the sight of Inuyasha and a _female_ companion talking to each other, the woman's body suggestively close to his.

Suddenly, the provocative woman that was quite beautiful leaned down and grabbed her husband's crotch.

'_My husband?! He's not my husband anymore!'_ Kagome argued with her mind as she promptly turned around, refusing to watch any more. Tears of pain and frustration threatened to fall on her cheeks, but she hurried to the bartender and left the package she was supposed to deliver before her waterworks could be given the chance to turn on.

Just as she was about to turn away from the sight of Inuyasha and walk outside, she found herself colliding with a hard, tall body.

Rising her eyes, they widened ridiculously at the sight of the man she hadn't seen in so long.

"S-sesshomaru?"

Her sharp voice sounded wrong to her ears, but her surprise was great. What was Sesshomaru doing in a bar? He didn't seem to be looking for either drinks or female company. The man, her ex brother-in-law didn't say anything or show any emotion, but that was expected from him. However, even though she was quite used to that, it still made her nervous.

"Um… hello. Sorry, I've got to go," she said with the same squeaky voice while trying to push past him.

The outcome was… he did not budge. "You are a coward, Kagome Taisho," he said, deliberately challenging her.

She frowned at him and immediately corrected his mistake, "Higurashi."

For an instant, she could swear she saw the ghost of a triumphant smirk on his lips, but it might have been her imagination, because they suddenly moved according to the solemn words that were being thrown at her, "I see."

Eyes widening, Kagome painfully realized her mistake. Would he tell Inuyasha?

"Turn around" was his harsh demand and she didn't dare disobey him for fear of him telling Inuyasha what she had unwillingly disclosed.

'_I'm such an idiot. I should have known Sesshomaru would pull his conniving stuff at me.'_

She knew exactly what he wanted her to see. Slowly, she turned around, praying to all the Kami that the sight wouldn't damage her forever.

* * *

Inuyasha _knew_ his eyes should have been wide, but they were in fact pretty narrow. Oddly resembling twin slits, actually. He'd spent quite some time being confused that he wasn't sure how to react anymore. While his mind had been desperately trying to get a grip, the woman, that little witch – Kaguya – had started teasing his ear with her talented tongue while languidly rubbing him through his jeans. And _it wasn't working_.

Unsure if it was the alcohol or anything else, he scrunched his nose and frowned at the bold woman before he pushed her hand away from him, almost scowling in disgust. He'd had to deal with horny bitches like her for years, but it didn't get easier when the only touch he wanted and would always welcome was Kagome's.

"Just leave me the fuck alone you slut! Can't you see I'm fucking mad?" he shouted at her, not caring that he was in a bar where other people would hear whatever he said. He saw her flash an incredulous look at someone who was vaguely familiar in the shadows of the room.

Even angrier, he clenched his fists and proceeded to talk her out of ever approaching him again. "I thought I told that bitch girl friend of yours, Yura, not to come close to me ever again. That request is available for the whole female population, so just get off my case already. You saw I wasn't interested."

Her hurt scowl was pretty clear even in the dim light, but she preferred not to reply and just leave him talking instead. This didn't piss him off further; on the contrary, it just served to make him feel relieved.

He'd chosen his brother's bar for a reason: there weren't many people who came here, and the ones who did come were distinguished ones, so he could drink to his heart's desire without interruptions. But these women that kept coming onto him proved his strategy wrong.

Slightly calmer, Inuyasha ordered another shot, never noticing the astonished gaze of his ex wife behind him.

* * *

Kagome had a hard time believing that what she saw was true. Inuyasha was refusing any female advances? And that girl looked gorgeous enough to be a model, too! She couldn't help but feel a slight hope bloom inside her chest, forcing her to believe he was acting like this because of her. Because he still loved her.

Had Inuyasha had lovers in the meantime? The scene he'd just caused led her to believe otherwise, and this made her content for some reason. Still... after so many years?

Turning around to face Sesshomaru, she wasn't surprised to see him still expressionless, as if what he'd witness was a very normal occurrence. Somehow, she didn't doubt it was. But the next words that came out of his mouth shocked her into taking a step backwards. She had always known that her brother-in-law thought highly of her, like Inuyasha didn't deserve a woman of her caliber, but this was a way too personal admission on his part.

"This is as much as I am willing to interfere on my half brother's part," the businessman revealed, leaving the woman before him agape.

Suddenly trembling, Kagome found herself asking the question that had been plaguing her ever since she'd seen Inuyasha once again.

"Did you tell Inuyasha all those years ago that I asked about him?"

There was a long while when the stoic man didn't answer, but eventually he saw fit to divulge such information. "It was not my business to meddle."

Kagome found herself nodding automatically, a grim feeling coating her innards. Sesshomaru hadn't told Inuyasha she'd tried to speak with him! Granted, it had only been once, as she'd been reluctant to insist. So Inuyasha probably thought she'd avoided him all those years? Well, she _had_ for a while, always asking Ayumi not to answer to her ex husband's frantic calls, until she learned something she now wondered if she should have insisted he knew.

Shrugging off the uncomfortable sensation, she bit her lip, not knowing what to say. Awkwardly, she settled for, "Thank you… I guess."

"This Sesshomaru will not say a word," he assured her, leaving her in favor of going to Inuyasha and probably stopping him from drinking more than he already had. Kagome wondered how often this happened. Did Sesshomaru have to do this many times a week? Perhaps every day? Had Inuyasha turned into an alcoholic?

Nevertheless, she didn't let her musings make her remain in the same bar as Inuyasha as she scurried to the club. Rubbing her arms when she entered, she noticed Ayumi wasn't on the dance floor anymore. In fact, she wasn't anywhere to be seen. Groaning, the woman left.

* * *

A lot of things had been on Sesshomaru's mind. The day before he'd seen Kagome in his bar and had felt compelled to refuse to let her leave without seeing how Inuyasha was without her. Had she understood his point? Did she know in what condition she'd left his brother?

A brief look at Inuyasha's slumped shoulders and broken demeanor told the businessman more than any words could. Something had happened that had driven Inuyasha both angry and more depressed than he'd seen him in a long time.

The dinner was awfully quiet and even Rin knew to keep her mouth shut. That was a first. But even to her it must have been painfully obvious Inuyasha wasn't in the mood for talking. As a matter of fact, Sesshomaru was mildly surprised his brother had decided to come to dinner after all.

Not being the one for chatting and avoiding the subject for too long, he cut straight to the point.

"What happened?"

Inuyasha made a weird sound that hang somewhere between a whine and an annoyed grunt. In other circumstances it would have been funny.

"Nothing."

The answer was _pathetic_. Even Inuyasha must have known that, what with the way he frowned.

"So you saw her," Sesshomaru concluded when his brother refused to say anything more. Inuyasha didn't as much as flinch and that told the older brother that he was dead-on. "Was she with her husband?" He knew that wasn't possible, but he wanted to know what it was that had Inuyasha so down.

The devastated man shook his head slowly, still refusing to make eye contact with anyone. Seeing as he wouldn't get any information yet, Sesshomaru resumed his eating until a few meekly spoken words halted his fork midway to his mouth.

"She was with her daughter…"

Rin's eyes snapped wide open in time to watch her father show the biggest amount of surprise she had ever seen him express. His eyes were slightly wider; it was almost impossible to notice, but they were. Even his lips were somewhat parted – however, she didn't know if it was from his shock or from the fact that he had been about to swallow a forkful of steak.

The businessman stood up abruptly and left the apartment, leaving the other two wondering what had brought the sudden departure.

* * *

Kagome was brutally brought out of her sleep by some equally brutal knocks on her apartment door. Wrapping her arms around her nightgown, she hurried to open before whoever was out there would wake up her daughter. The moment she opened the door, a flash of black rushed past her, almost throwing her into the wall. She closed the door unthinkingly when she realized the man that had barged into her home was Sesshomaru.

His glare was scorching and she found herself shrinking further into the wall. Whatever made him so angry wasn't good.

"Where is she?" he demanded, his eyes blazing as Kagome's widened in sudden fear.

"How did you find me?" she asked, vaguely afraid of his answer that unfortunately never came. She was sure it hadn't been a problem for him.

"I shall feel compelled to tell him myself if you do not do it as soon as possible," he said grimly, letting her know that he was more than serious.

Suddenly, the severity of the situation hit Kagome harder than a truck. She'd kept things from Inuyasha, probably in a subconscious desire to hurt him back and lie to him as he'd lied to her, but did that make her like him? _'Am I any better?'_

"I have never imagined you could do such a thing," he spat at her, malice enveloping his words.

Her face was blank when something clicked. "I wanted to talk to him when I found out, but _you_ didn't deliver the message."

A sudden unidentifiable emotion flickered in his eyes, but it disappeared the moment it came. "I had no idea it was something of this importance. You did not insist."

"And why would I? He hurt me and when I couldn't find him I assumed he left. Why would I think he wanted anything more to do with me?" she asked.

"Idiot!"

He seemed a step away from shouting at her and she wondered if she would like what he had to say. Probably not.

"Why did you tell him you had a husband?" he asked suddenly, not believing her look of sheer confusion.

"Who told him that?"

"I _assume_ you did," he replied, intentionally using the same verb she'd used.

"Well, I did not!"

Sudden understanding crossed Sesshomaru's features as he remembered his brother had mentioned something about calling Kagome's best friend, Ayumi. It was probably that girl who told him that lie.

"Tell me, Kagome. Why is it that you hid this from him for all these years?"

His tone was slightly sarcastic, mocking her, but she wouldn't let him have his way.

"It's not like he didn't deserve it."

Her words angered the older brother for some reason and he found himself wanting to scratch some sense into this crazy woman. Coolly keeping his composure though, the businessman's upper lip twitched. "You have no idea what you have done to him." Approaching her and almost causing her to ingrain herself in the wall she stood against, he spat out maliciously, "You have _destroyed_ the man you knew as Inuyasha Taisho."

She didn't know why, but she was trembling. The words he said, they couldn't be true! His face was almost touching hers as he leaned down and glared at her spitefully. "He's an idiot and he's a bastard, but he is not evil and he did not lie to you to hurt you, but to protect you."

Feeling it was more than he would have normally said, Sesshomaru straightened and sent her another dark look, meant more to scold her for making him state thoughts he didn't usually let others hear than anything else. Without a warning, he dashed out of her apartment, leaving the quivering woman alone with his words pounding in her head.

'_To protect me?'_

Shaking uncontrollably, Kagome fought the sobs that threatened to consume her. She remembered all those times when Inuyasha had insisted he would always protect her, even from himself. She let herself slide against the wall, landing unceremoniously on her butt. Unthinkingly, she threw a nervous glance at Aiko's bedroom and tears did start falling freely down her cheeks.

'_He lied! He lied to me! He broke our vows…He left me defenseless against my pain…'_

She relived that fateful night when Kikyou had appeared at their door demanding a divorce. The pain felt fresh, as did the betrayal. Why had Inuyasha seemed fit to hide his marriage to Kikyou from her?

'_He didn't want me to know! He wanted to have his path open in case he'd ever want to return to her!'_

As preposterous as the idea sounded, she found she believed it and had always believed it.

'_Is that the kind of faith I have in Inuyasha?'_

When the only answer she could think of was _yes_, she cried some more.

* * *

The door flung open and a pretty woman dressed as a maid bowed deeply in fear. "W-welcome home, Sesshomaru-sama!"

He ignored her and stormed to the dining room, not at all surprised to find it empty. He knew Inuyasha would be in Rin's room if he wasn't already at his own apartment drinking himself to sleep. If 'that woman' didn't tell him soon, then Sesshomaru would make sure Inuyasha knew.

'_The nerve of that reckless woman!'_

Opening his adopted daughter's door, he watched his younger brother asleep next to the girl. He looked troubled even while he slept and Sesshomaru didn't doubt he was having terrible nightmares. The ever stoic businessman wasn't one to care, but even he had had enough after so many years of seeing Inuyasha barely get by.

Sesshomaru made sure the door would screech sharply enough to wake his brother, who was always alert to the sounds around him. As expected, Inuyasha opened his eyes curtly and stood.

"How long was I asleep?" he asked, rubbing his eyes in a slow motion. Sesshomaru didn't reply; he merely walked out of the room, a clear sign for his brother to follow.

As soon as they were in the dining room, Sesshomaru didn't waste any time.

"Who told you Kagome is married?"

Inuyasha's eyes snapped wide open. "Ayumi," he answered, unsure of where this was going.

"Hn," the businessman acknowledged.

"Where were you?" Inuyasha asked, suddenly suspicious. It had been weird that Seshsomaru had rushed away from dinner, and it was even weirder that he was asking this question _now_ of all times.

"You should mind your own business."

"Then you should mind yours, too," Inuyasha said, narrowing his eyes. What was it with Sesshomaru and his stupid questions? Until today, he hadn't asked a thing.

"Very well," the older brother stated, retreating to go to bed. Annoyed, Inuyasha made to follow him, but quickly realized he had nothing to gain from this. Instead, he helped himself out of Sesshomaru's home, heading straight to his, where he'd be left alone to his own devices.


	4. Destroyed Happiness 4

**Destroyed happiness**

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Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha, and I do not make money off my stories**.**

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Kagome shivered. She prayed. Sincerely, with tears coating every inch of her face, her heart called out to every Kami she knew of and begged for forgiveness. The silence of the night and the sound of her own quiet sobs were proving to be inspiring, as she finally realized what she'd done. The gravity of the foolish, irrational decision she'd made so many years ago. A father didn't know of his child, and she was the one that had taken that right away from him.

If there was one thing Kagome had always wished not to be was a traitor, but she'd become just that. She'd been betrayed by this man she still loved, and had, in turn, betrayed him. But which betrayal hurt more? For a moment, she was inclined to think hers did, since Inuyasha still did not know about Aiko, but she immediately chased the treacherous thoughts away from her mind.

How would she feel if she found out she had a daughter Kagome hadn't known about? Shame filled her with a sickening intensity, and she felt embarrassed it had taken an outsider, and one as stoic as Sesshomaru, to make her see the truth. To make her see things from Inuyasha's point of view. Didn't he deserve to know his daughter? Wouldn't he want to hold her knowing he helped give her life? Had Kagome already made that decision for him?

Guilty tears made their way into her eyes, seemingly unending. Still, she welcomed each and every one, as they seemed to wash away all her horrible sins. In the quiet night, Kagome could only pray.

* * *

Inuyasha mourned. He mourned for what he'd perceived as his life, which was quickly fading. He was very aware of his self-destructive ways and a part of him constantly fought against it, but he welcomed the numbness the alcohol brought to his senses. Every drop made him hazy; it offered him something he would never find anywhere else: oblivion. There was a part of him that kept reminding him what Kagome would say about his actions, but then he would remember Kagome had nothing to do with him any longer. She didn't belong to him anymore. It was then when he realized he'd thrown away years of his life hoping, praying she would return to him. And to what result? She'd distanced herself from him more than she could ever have, and he was the only one responsible for it.

This knowledge made his self-hatred seem plausible, so he drank some more, until he could barely remember who he was thinking about. Kagome had always haunted his mind, his very soul, but he would learn to live without her. If only love wasn't so much like a dead weight… He'd been telling himself he'd get over her ever since she left, but hadn't been able to do it. She was still ever-present in his mind and heart; he just couldn't manage to carve her out.

_My mind's an empty universe. It was once so full of you…_

His body ached, his breath was short and heavy, but Inuyasha felt calm. Sesshomaru could go sing carols for all he cared. There was nothing better than alcohol in situations like this. In all reality, it was the first time Inuyasha had let himself get carried away by this liquor-induced numbness, but he was ever so grateful for the lack of coherent thoughts and clear feelings that would otherwise hurt like hell.

His Kagome was now married, and had a happy life and a beautiful, happy child that looked so much like her. She had a family of her own, and she'd probably managed to make all of her dreams come true. A part of him rejoiced in her bliss, but there was always the darker, sadder, selfish side that still wanted her for himself.

He was a hopeless soul.

* * *

Kagome couldn't have been more startled by Ayumi's distinctive way of sliding the keys in the door lock. She nearly jumped out of her very skin at the loud noise that shook her out of her nightmares. Sometime during the night she'd fallen asleep, crying and regretting her choices. Her eyes felt swollen and she was sure she wasn't a sight for sore eyes. She probably looked like she hadn't eaten for weeks, but she wasn't hungry, either.

"Ohayou, Kagome-san," the cheerful voice greeted her and it tool all her will for Kagome not to break down and cry in front of her best friend. However, she knew it was too late as soon as Ayumi stiffened in the doorway upon seeing her sitting on the floor, propped against the wall. She hadn't wanted to be exposed, but there was nothing she could do now. The only remaining option was to refuse to tell her what had happened.

"Kagome? Did something happen?" Ayumi asked, concern flickering in her orbs. Suddenly, her eyes widened in recognition. "Oh, no!" she gasped, both of her hands covering her mouth as she dropped the keys on the floor, unconsciously taking a few steps back and closing the door with her shoulder blades. "Did you sleep with anyone? Is that why you're so miserable?"

Kagome's eyes shimmered with fresh tears, but she felt she couldn't answer. How did you tell your best friend that you ruined two people's lives? How could she live with herself now that she had finally realized how much of her daughter and her ex husband's lives she had stolen. They could have shared so many things; Inuyasha could have watched his daughter grow up. But she hadn't given him the chance. She hadn't given _them_ the opportunity.

"Oh my God, is it Aiko?" she asked desperately and made to the girl's bedroom, but was promptly stopped by Kagome's pitiful grunt.

"No, it's… it's me."

"Do you mean Inuyasha?" she asked hesitantly, and Kagome thought for a few seconds before nodding and answering.

"Yes," she said, feeling so much like a coward for doing it, "Yes, I mean Inuyasha."

Fortunately, Ayumi knew when to drop the subject, but that only left Kagome wondering if that was what she wanted. She somehow felt the need to receive a punishment, be it merely verbal. With a great deal of pain, she unintentionally thought back to Inuyasha's favorite punishments for her disobedience. Kagome could remember everything, from every word spoken down to every caress, every rough kiss shared, and every part of her heart that had been stolen by that man. He would dominate her and make her understand she shouldn't dream of disobeying him, but she knew it hadn't been all that serious to him. It was just their game, to help them keep things interesting and steamy.

A perfectly understandable fear spread inside her body like a virus; she didn't even want to think about the day she would tell Inuyasha he had a daughter. She knew it had to be soon, otherwise Sesshomaru would surely tell him, so she couldn't afford stalling too much. Would he be angry? Of course he would. Knowing Inuyasha, he would be furious, and hurt beyond words, as well. What would he do? Would he try to get custody? In that case, she could mention the incident with Kikyou… But would she? After all this time, after all these lies she'd fed herself, would she?

She didn't know what she would do. Anymore, she couldn't tell if she wanted him to be a part of Aiko's life or not. Maybe, just _maybe_ she'd deemed him unworthy. That was a horrible thing to do, but more and more she realized it was probably true. She hadn't insisted on finding him to let him know he had a daughter. She hadn't even told Sesshomaru so he could pass it on. She was a terrible person.

Slowly, Kagome lifted herself from the floor and went to the bathroom to clean her face. She almost cringed when she saw her face in the mirror; she looked awful. Deciding not to let her daughter see her in this state, Kagome practiced a realistic smile and felt better when she realized it looked genuine. Aiko would never guess, but Ayumi surely would. She would be waiting round the corner to harass Kagome with questions.

Sighing, Kagome went out of the bathroom. Her nose was instantly assaulted by delicious smells. It was clear Ayumi had already finished cooking breakfast. She wasn't much of a cook, but eggs and bacons were easy for her, so whenever she felt like dropping by and cooking breakfast Kagome would have nothing to object. Aiko was already eating, her cheekbones moving while she was chewing her food. Her lips were all greasy and she occasionally chewed with her mouth open. This reminded Kagome so much of Inuyasha at the beginning of their relationship, until she had 'educated' him. She briefly wondered how come Kikyou had done nothing of the sort before her.

"Ohayou, kaa-san," Aiko greeted, smiling. Kagome smiled, too, and sat next to her daughter, taking the plate Ayumi was offering her.

"Ohayou, honey. Slept well?"

"Yup," Aiko said excitedly, a bit of bacon hanging from the corner of her mouth. This time genuinely, Kagome smiled and wiped her daughter's mouth with a napkin. She was just so adorable, stuffing her face like that.

"How about you, Ayumi?" Kagome asked, her eyes locking with her best friend's, an open smile on her lips. Ayumi had the good grace to blush and look at her plate, before muttering a barely intelligible, "Fine."

"Really? I'm glad. Was Bankotsu a sweetheart?"

Ayumi's face seemed to get redder by the minute; it was obvious she liked Bankotsu maybe too much. It was the second night she'd spent at his place and Kagome just knew it.

"He was great," she answered with a smile, but then frowned, as if remembering something. "How about you, Kagome?" she asked. The distressed woman stiffened at the question and sent a look that clearly stated she wouldn't reply in her daughter's presence.

"I'm great," Kagome lied, grimacing just a little. She was far from great.

Breakfast went on amiably and Aiko announced she would go play the piano. Kagome had bought her a toy keyboard so she could pretend she was playing the piano. It was really adorable to watch the little girl act as if she were a famous pianist, worshipped by the entire world. Unfortunately, this left Kagome alone with her best friend that didn't look like she would spare her.

"So… tell me everything," Ayumi instructed as soon as Aiko left the kitchen. Kagome sighed, having known she would be so abrupt.

"Sesshomaru knows. He knows I have a daughter and he knows I haven't told Inuyasha. He… he made me think…. he made me realize that I am a horrible person," Kagome explained reluctantly. She didn't know how Ayumi would take this; she was very mad at Inuyasha for doing what he had to Kagome, but perhaps she would stop seeing things from Kagome's point of view and start opening her eyes, too. Kagome felt she deserved some scolding. "He told me to tell Inuyasha, or else he'll tell him," she added.

Ayumi looked startled, confused, and then angry. "Those bastards," she said in a low voice, "After all he did to you…"

Kagome pursed her lips. "No, Ayumi," she cut her off, "he's right. Sesshomaru's right. What kind of person am I? I can't believe I did this. Do you realize? I stole so many precious years of Aiko's life with her father. She's asked me about her daddy so many times, remember? I should have told her… I should have told him." Kagome was on the verge of tears. The pain was too big, but she couldn't imagine how hard it would be for Inuyasha to accept he'd lost so many years with his daughter once he found out.

Ayumi seemed to consider this. She looked reluctant. Maybe she understood? Perhaps she'd know what to advise her.

"I think… I think you should tell Inuyasha," Ayumi said, her voice barely a whisper. She was ashamed, as well. All these years she had comforted Kagome, she'd told her not to bother telling him. She hadn't thought about Aiko one bit. It had all been some sort of revenge against Inuyasha. And after all… didn't people deserve a second chance? She'd forgotten that, and Kagome had, as well.

Kagome sighed deeply. It was easier said than done. "And what will I tell him?" she asked almost quietly. "Will I just go to him and tell him, Inuyasha, you have a daughter? I can't do that. I don't know what to do," she confessed, tears falling freely on her cheeks now.

"Yes, just… tell him. Just like that. There's no subtle way of putting it, Kagome, you know that. What's done is done. In your defense, you _have_ tried to contact him once," Ayumi said, trying to soothe her. She could easily understand Kagome's plight. Why couldn't things be as easy for her friend as they were for her?

"What if he wants full custody of Aiko?" Kagome asked, her voice betraying her dread.

"I… I don't think Inuyasha would d-do that," Ayumi stammered, her eyes wide. She hadn't considered this. But it wasn't like Inuyasha to do such a thing, was it?

"He's changed," Kagome said with a sigh. "But I think he still loves me," she added, feeling ashamed of herself. Her ex husband refused the advances of any women. Had he been waiting for her to return? Maybe he had…

_Oh, Inuyasha... what do I do now?_

* * *

Sesshomaru paced in his office. What should he do? He didn't know if that woman had any plans of telling Inuyasha about his daughter soon, but his brother had already begun to drink too much that the idea of a little girl to take care of sounded wonderful. Maybe she would bring him out of his suffering. And maybe afterwards he and Kagome would make things right. But this, he doubted. Would Inuyasha be able to forgive Kagome's lie? Would he forgive Sesshomaru? The ever so stoic man could only hope he would.

* * *

Kagome was trembling, and it wasn't even cold outside. She'd walked the same alley over and over, until her mind had begun to hurt, but now she could see it clearly. She knew what she had to do, and she would do it as soon as possible.

Her heart beating wildly against her chest, she called Ayumi. As soon as her best friend answered, she asked her if she could take care of her daughter for a while longer, because she had to find Inuyasha and tell him the truth. The whole truth.

As soon as she found herself in front of her old apartment door, her breath started coming out in short puffs. She felt faint, but she wouldn't be deterred. However, as she raised her hand to knock, she stopped. What would she say to him? What would _he_ say to her? Would he hate her for the rest of his life? She knew this was silly, because _she_ had left _him_, but somehow, she knew she wanted to be with him again.

Determined, she knocked on the door loudly, her head throbbing with millions of scenarios. After about half a minute that seemed more like a prolonged hour, the door opened abruptly, startling the hell out of Kagome. Her eyes widened when she saw the way Inuyasha looked. He didn't have a shirt, his hair was tousled, and his eyes seemed injected. Was he drunk? He looked so skinny, too…

"Yeah?" he asked coldly, his eyes never leaving hers. She felt intimidated by the heat of his gaze, but she stood her ground.

"May I come in?' she asked, trying to keep any emotions out of her voice.

"What for?" he asked harshly, his eyes indicating he'd had enough of this endless torture.

"Please… will you let me come in?"

His jaw tightened visibly as he stepped aside to let her enter. The apartment looked oddly the same, as if he'd never moved an object from its rightful place. Was that his way of having her around with him at all times? After all, _she_ had decorated it like it was now. Her eyes moved to the empty bottles on the floor and she frowned.

"Have you been drinking?" she asked, her tone admonishing.

"What's it to you?" he asked in the same cold way that made her flinch. He was right. She had given up the right to reprimand him the day she'd left him. He could make his own calls.

Inuyasha knew he shouldn't be this bitter with her, but he couldn't help it. Maybe it was the alcohol in his system, or maybe it was his agony that drove him to utter despair. What was she doing here, anyway? Did she come to see him suffer? To see him torture himself? Was she here to relish his misery? If it was so, then she had no business in this apartment. The apartment that had once been hers, as well. A whimper pushed its way out of his mouth at that thought and he found himself suddenly embarrassed. Kagome seemed surprised, as well.

"What are you doing here? Does your husband know you're here?" he asked, genuinely interested. Did her husband know about him? Did he know she'd been married once before? He probably did; Kagome wasn't the kind of person who would hide such a thing. But _he_ was; he flinched at the memories.

"Who told you I have a husband?" she asked in a meek voice, barely looking him in the eye.

"Ayumi did. Wait, what?" he asked, his eyes widening ridiculously. Was she a single mother? Had she been abandoned? Sudden anger filled him at the though of Kagome being left alone to raise some bastard's child. Or had her husband died? If so, then she'd suffered way more than he had. In any case, it seemed that she had suffered more, but he wasn't ready to dwell on that thought for long.

"I'm not married," she explained and he cocked an eyebrow. Was Aiko a child from a one night stand? Or did Kagome have a boyfriend instead? Maybe she'd realized marriage only brought misfortune, and she'd wanted to avoid bad luck.

Or maybe…

"What are you saying?" he asked desperately, the haze the alcohol had brought starting to slowly fade.

Kagome turned her head to the side in a meditative manner, but when her gaze settled on his again, he could see guilt clearly etched on her features.

"I never married. I… I haven't let any man near me since the day I left," Kagome revealed and gulped, shame filling every inch of her body. Soon Inuyasha would realize what she was trying to tell him and would hate her for all eternity.

"Then whose – " he started, but immediately stopped, the words hanging in the thin air between them. His jaw tightened again as his hand began to visibly shake on the glass he was holding.

He _knew_.

* * *

**_A/N: I just wanted to say I really wondered a lot if Kagome should tell Inuyasha about Aiko _****_so soon_****_... but then again, it seemed the best choice. The sooner, the better, right? She's kept __it from him for too long_**. **_And it's not like Kagome forgave him for the Kikyou thing. She's just aware that she still loves him and that she should have reacted differently that fateful night._**

**_It might seem like she's a horrible person, but her soul has been poisoned with thoughts and memories of how he lied to her, so it's understandable._**

_**Anyway, hope you enjoyed this chapter. It's still surprising for me to see what has become of this story that was originally meant to be a oneshot. I hope it's not disappointing.  
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	5. Destroyed Happiness 5

**Destroyed happiness**

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Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha, and I do not make money off my stories.**  
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_**A/N: I'm going to explain a few things first. I spent a lot of time wondering how Inuyasha should react to the news, and this is what I decided. While some of you will **__**probably **__**be disappointed - maybe having expected something more... drastic - it just seemed a lot more realistic this way. I tried to put myself in their shoes, and while I know each one has valid reasons to be extremely hostile towards each other, this is the conclusion I have: Kagome has had quite some time to reflect on what she's done, even though she is still hurt by Inuyasha's betrayal - therefore, she is experiencing mixed feelings: on one hand she feels really guilty for not having insisted, and on the other hand she is bitter towards Inuyasha for the thing with Kikyou; likewise, Inuyasha feels guilty for not having told her about his marriage to Kikyou, but at the same time, angry that she didn't let him know about Aiko.**_

_**So... I guess that in a way they are both trying not to be too hostile towards the other, realizing their own mistakes, but quite unable not.**_

_**Well, that being said, enjoy :)  
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The sound of shattered grass filled the apartment and Kagome flinched. Appalled, she watched as crimson blood trickled down Inuyasha's hand, coating his long, slender fingers, and yet he didn't move. There wasn't a single twitch on his impassive face as he openly stared at her, seemingly searching her entire soul through her waiting eyes. His eyes were dilated and cold – he was clearly drunk, but not so that he wouldn't be able to make a rational decision. In fact, it almost seemed like he'd sobered up – while Kagome had immediately realized that he'd subjected himself to alcohol and that was partly the reason behind his cold demeanor, she could clearly notice he seemed more clear-headed now.

She supposed it could have been a much worse reaction; so far he'd just clenched the glass to destruction. But the unreadable expression on his face blatantly told her there was more to come.

"Get out," he rasped, his voice resolute. Her first hurt response would have been giving him a piece of her mind, but something prevented her from doing it. She felt somewhat irritated that he was being so unreasonable. _'Unreasonable?! You kept his child away from him!'_ her mind seemed to counter. Without protesting, she nodded and turned on her heels to exit the apartment, although unable to hide her disappointment. She'd hoped she would be able to make him see things her way; he had, after all, betrayed her, and she _had_ tried to tell him.

"Wait," he demanded just as she was about to leave, and she stopped. Not bothering to turn around, she merely listened to what she had to say. "What kind of a person are you?" he snapped venomously – she could almost feel the poison in his words. Truth was, she didn't know. Not anymore. To some extent, she had disappointed herself. "I don't know you," he said next, his icy, hateful words bringing tears to her eyes. Kagome swallowed thickly before shaking her head. Slowly, fearful of looking him in the eye, she moved towards the door.

"You're being harsh," she said weakly, frustrated to feel wetness at the corners of her eyes. His hollow laughter didn't help, either. "Harsh?!" he inquired and she nodded. For what it was worth, "I did try to tell you all those years ago. I called and…" He narrowed his eyes when she trailed off. "No, you didn't," he stated grimly. She couldn't have. If it were so, then how come he hadn't heard from her?

"Yes. Yes, I did," she countered, wiping her eyes with the back of her hand. "It wasn't my intention to keep your daughter from you, but I thought… I thought you'd moved on with your life," she confessed.

He found it very, very hard to believe her. This was the woman he loved with all his heart, but this was also the woman that had destroyed him forever. Why should he believe her? Just because she was Kagome and Kagome never lied? _Everyone lies_, he reminded himself. By now she had turned around again and was openly gazing at him with her big, expressive eyes and he found it increasingly difficult to breathe.

"You are really something else, coming here and feeding me all these lies, when in fact you've taken me away from the only person I can say belongs to me now," he said with a low growl, his voice gradually raising, "How the hell is this supposed to make me feel?! I," he declared almost a breath away from her, "have lost precious years of my daughter's life. You're the most vicious woman, did you know that?"

She stomped her foot indignantly, making a huffing sound, which threw him off for a moment. This was a gesture that was purely Kagome; he could remember every distinctive time she had done the same thing in the past, when they'd been married. "Who are you to talk to me about viciousness, you cruel bastard? Weren't you the one secretly seeing your ex wife behind my back? Weren't you the one who cheated on your first wife? What kind of man does that, huh?!" she yelled in his face, resisting the urge to grab him by the hair and pull on it until his head hurt. He was so infuriating!

"The kind of man that fucking loves you, bitch!" he retorted, his nail suddenly digging into her shoulder. She snorted noisily at his remark, clearly showing her disbelief. "Yeah," she mocked, "you loved me so much that you didn't see fit to tell me you were married? Oh, and let me tell you another one. You _met_ with your wife while _we_ were married, and she _clearly_ saw it as a date! It can't get more obvious than that!" she shouted, tears falling freely on her cheeks, but her voice was abnormally normal.

"Not _loved_ you, woman; _love_ you. Did you think I could forget you just like that? What the hell do you take me for?" he scolded, shaking some sense into her, before he added snappily, "And it wasn't a date!" The words and actions made her lightheaded, but she stood her ground.

"Don't give me that," she groaned, "You're the perfect liar. You've lied to me for… for how long? Too much, Inuyasha, too damn much." She sighed. "You shouldn't be angry at me, because if anything, you deserved it. And besides, I _did_ try to reach you."

That again. He narrowed his eyes again. She kept saying that. "And why couldn't you?" he asked, this time truthfully intrigued by her answer.

Kagome, however, didn't really want to tell him she had spoken to Sesshomaru and he hadn't told Inuyasha about it. She knew how fragile the relationship between Inuyasha and his brother was and had always been, and she didn't want to ruin it further. But Sesshomaru was a fully grown man, wasn't he? He could explain to Inuyasha his reasoning.

Averting her eyes, Kagome muttered something that resembled Sesshomaru's name. "What?" Inuyasha asked, genuinely confused.

"I said, Sesshomaru. Sesshomaru answered and said you were away. I didn't ask where and he didn't offer to tell me, so I figured you had left to forget everything about that chapter of your life," she explained.

Inuyasha was suffering a severe internal battle. On the one hand he wanted to strangle his brother, but on the other hand, he couldn't help but have mixed feelings about this whole situation. He wanted to believe Kagome, but it hurt. She'd made him suffer so much, but this took the cake. He wanted to enjoy the knowledge that he and Kagome had created something so pure, something so fragile and cute, Aiko, but even this was stolen from him. He couldn't help but feel bitterness towards the woman that held his heart.

He finally settled for a sickened, "How convenient." She seemed to have expected his scoff as she merely shrugged.

"Believe what you want," she huffed, moving away from him and wrapping her arms around herself. The way she looked through the window, it awoke something within him, something he had deemed long lost. Her eyes spoke of her exhaustion, her skin seemed to scream for his touch. There was a constant battle inside him, his mind fighting against the pull of his heart. Kagome sighed, resigned. "What was I supposed to do? Desperately look for you all over the world so you can come lie to me again? I'm sorry Inuyasha, but life doesn't work that way," she said, shaking her head miserably. All the pain she'd felt since she'd discovered his betrayal, it was all coming back and she was helplessly facing it.

Inuyasha couldn't decide if she was being truthful or not. This was the Kagome he'd always known and loved. She sounded so sincere, so tired of all this nonsense, but why should he believe her? She hadn't believed him when he'd said he hadn't cheated on her. A relationship always required trust above all, but she hadn't given that to him. They weren't in a relationship anymore, and she still didn't trust him. She didn't believe his words, no matter how much he tried.

"You know," he said, "it's the same thing. You didn't believe me, so why should _I_ believe _you_? For all I know, you've never really called Sesshomaru."

"Because _I_ don't lie." was her simple answer, to which he furrowed his brow.

"I did it to protect you," he argued breathlessly, genuinely believing his own words. He hadn't wanted her to know about Kikyou, hadn't wanted her to go through the ordeal that had been his divorce so they could be together. He had struggled alone, desperately trying to end his first marriage so he could move on with the love of his life. And all along, he had tried to protect her from the sheer knowledge. However, it seemed like the plan had backfired on him.

"Protect me how?" she asked, scrunching her nose as she analyzed him from toes to head. She couldn't believe he was even saying this. Protect her?!

"Would you have still fought for our love if you knew how hard it was for me to get my divorce? Would you have wanted me if you knew I was already married? Tell me, Kagome, would you have been there for me whenever Kikyou refused to grant me my divorce and tried to get me back despite our lack of positive feelings for each other?" he accused, gritting his teeth.

"How selfish of you," Kagome muttered spitefully, unwilling to meet his eyes. Her last comment surprised him and he found himself staring at her back as she moved to leave the apartment. Time stood still. There were many words behind her statement that remained unspoken. How selfish of him not to trust her, not to want to share with her. How selfish of him to fear her leaving him. How selfish of him to dare not tell her he'd been married. But even so, he knew he deserved a second chance.

Without thinking much, he grabbed her elbow and spun her around, almost holding her in the confines of his arms. He felt like killing her and hugging her for all she was worth at the same time, and he had a hard time separating the feelings and deciding to act on one specific impulse rather than on the other. For a moment he was tempted to swear to himself to never drink again.

But all thoughts vanished when his mind finally agreed with the rapidly whispered song of his heart. He wanted to know. He wanted to know if things could ever work for them again. He had no idea if she loved him anymore; all he knew was that he wished with all his heart that he could forgive her and that she could forgive him. He had to find out if he could keep trying. If it was worth the struggle.

Not letting her protest, he dipped his head and pressed his lips against her gently at first, then demandingly, coaxing her mouth open so he could taste her. His heart skipped a beat when she moaned against his lips, adding a delicious pleasure to the passionate kiss they were sharing. Something deep inside him warned him not to take it further, but he ignored everything. He moved his hand to cup the side of her neck, tilting her head so the angle offered him a deeper invasion. Thankfully, Kagome was brought back to her senses when she realized what she'd allowed him to do and stopped the kiss, breathlessly pulling away from him.

It was a mistake, she kept telling herself. Even as she left the apartment without looking back and without being held back, Kagome clung to the sole thought that the kiss had been just that: a mistake. Now if only she could believe it…

* * *

Sesshomaru grunted. _That stupid woman!_ But he couldn't honestly blame her. He had expected her to tell his brother he had spoken to her years ago when she'd found out she was pregnant. Now Inuyasha was inconsolable. Sesshomaru was quite certain it had nothing to do with _his_ brotherly betrayal, but with the knowledge that he had been denied the chance to see his daughter grow at his wife's side. And Kagome wasn't Inuyasha's wife anymore, too.

It usually wasn't in the businessman's vocabulary, but Sesshomaru had swallowed his never-ending pride and apologized to his brother for the inconvenience caused. He was aware of how his silence had affected the younger man, and he regretted that now. However, as much as the present revolved around the past, there was nothing to be done so he could mend it. He could only feel guilty and sorry.

In his alcohol-induced haze Inuyasha seemed a bit mad, now that Sesshomaru thought about it. One minute he would smile at the thought of having a daughter, and the other he'd curse Kagome's prolonged silence. Then he would insist it wasn't her fault before deciding it actually was. This was one of the reasons Sesshomaru never liked being around Inuyasha when he drank. He was too confusing, too desolated, and the businessman always felt unable to help.

"You should better sleep," Sesshomaru suggested, his voice just a tad bit demanding. Inuyasha wrinkled his nose, frowning deeply. He didn't seem to have heard him. Instead, he downed another glass of whatever he was drinking and this time it was Sesshomaru's time to scrunch his nose. How Inuyasha was not yet in a coma, it was beyond him. And still, he looked fairly sober for someone who'd drunk as much as he had. Talked rather coherently, too.

"Shee shtill loves me," Inuyasha drawled, almost letting his head collide with the table, as he was unable to hold it straight much longer.

Sesshomaru's eyes widened at the confession; what did Inuyasha mean by that? Did she tell him that herself?

"I kissed her," Inuyasha explained simply, as if he understood his brother's confusion. "I'm… s-sure she loves me."

Something unexpected happened then. Sesshomaru's eyes softened and, even though Inuyasha didn't see it, they flashed a look of pity to the younger, miserable brother. Was Inuyasha trying to grasp a thread of hope and hang onto it like a lifeline? Was that it? Or had he imagined everything so it would be easier for him?

It wasn't a secret to Sesshomaru that Kagome did still love Inuyasha, but the woman seemed unable to forgive him. Maybe in time… but on second thought, he still couldn't imagine Kagome willingly coming back to Inuyasha to live a happily ever after life with him. The woman had her principles and her pride; besides, their trust issues were obvious to any eyes-possessing individual by now. They had nearly destroyed their lives. And if _that_ wasn't something to deter them, then the thing with Aiko surely was. Inuyasha couldn't seem to decide if Kagome spoke the truth or if she really wanted to hide Aiko from him.

Sesshomaru couldn't really blame Kagome for anything, even though her actions had hurt his brother so much. From her point of view, what Inuyasha had done to her really seemed unforgivable; but then, where was the ever forgiving, gentle girl Inuyasha had introduced to Sesshomaru so many years ago? It seemed that she could find excuses for anyone except her husband. But this was understandable, as well. She'd placed her whole trust in this man that had ultimately lied to her. Naturally, her self-defense mechanism had reacted, not letting her try and work things out because of the pain.

It all seemed complicated to Sesshomaru. Had he been in Inuyasha's shoes – not that _that_ could ever happen – he'd have forcefully made his woman stay until he'd explained to her his reasoning and made her understand and _accept_ it as well, as long as he was innocent. But Inuyasha wasn't like that. He was a lot weaker, always afraid of rejection for some reason.

The businessman watched as Inuyasha's brow furrowed in distress for the umpteenth time – it didn't take a genius to figure out what the cause was. Or rather, _who_ the cause was. But despite how convinced he was of it being otherwise, Sesshomaru still hoped Inuyasha could get his happy ending.

_Only because he's been annoying me for too long._


	6. Destroyed Happiness 6

**Destroyed happiness**

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Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha, and I do not make money off my stories.**  
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_**A/N: I'm sorry for the long, long pause, but I've been focusing on other stories. Here comes another chapter - I'm just so optimistic these days, I think it shows in this chapter. Enjooooy and thank you all for your constant support :) Oh, and btw, there's no Houjo bashing, I just found the idea pretty funny and ironic.  
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Inuyasha was sober. For a week he'd stayed sober in case Kagome decided to come by with her daughter – _their_ daughter, but nothing happened. Maybe she was scared, yes, she had to be. He'd told his brother not to butt in anymore – he was done needing his help. From now on, if something good happened he wanted it to be because of him and Kagome and Aiko, not because of Sesshomaru. Yes, he was grateful to his brother, but no he didn't need his help anymore.

But then, why wasn't Kagome coming? He'd expected her to come, to say something. To have a reaction. To…

What should he have expected?

He hadn't been that drunk that night, just a bit hazy, so he knew he hadn't said anything too out of line. He'd just… kissed her. Was that the problem? Was that what stopped her from coming?

He wanted to call her, to go check on her and Aiko, to do something.

What if she decided to find another man fast so he wouldn't have a say-so in the matter anymore? Well, he was the child's father, so he had as many rights over her as Kagome did, but he wanted them both. He wanted the mother and the daughter.

He was calm now. A week had passed, he'd had a lot of _sober_ time to think, so now he knew how to react. They were both at fault, he couldn't keep blaming himself or Kagome. They had to start from scratch if they wanted a new life. Would she ever forgive him? He'd make sure she would.

_Like Hell am I letting her get away this time._

Okay, so he had to do something, otherwise he'd surely lose her.

_Tomorrow. If she doesn't come tomorrow, I'm going to go get them._

* * *

The next day came and Kagome still hadn't given any signs that she might return. That was the last straw for him! He'd waited, and waited, and waited, and now he just _had_ to see her!

Determined, Inuyasha asked his brother for Kagome's address and raced to her apartment, eager to see her and tell her he was willing to try. He was willing to fix their relationship. He wanted nothing more than to be a good husband, a legitimate husband, and a father to Aiko. This was his dream. This was his goal. He'd do anything.

Smiling, Inuyasha knocked on her door, only to have his expression fall at the sight of Ayumi's slightly horrified face.

"Come in," she urged, "come in. I didn't know how to do to call you without Kagome finding out."

This scared him, but okay, "What's the matter?"

"It's Kagome. She-"

"What's wrong with Kagome?" he panicked, his heart literally beating wildly against his chest. "Where's Aiko?" Ayumi began shaking her head, but Inuyasha wasn't concentrating anymore, "Where's my daughter?"

"Shh! Shut up, you idiot! She's fine. Both are fine now. Kagome's sleeping. She spent three days in the hospital, that's why she didn't call you or anything. Now she's resting. Will you keep your voice down?"

It was a relief, really, it was, but, "What was the matter with her? What did she have?"

"She didn't get much into it, but I think she was weakened. She just… fainted one day. Luckily, I was there, because Aiko wouldn't have been able to do much. I drove her to the hospital and took care of the girl for those three days. Kagome told me not to tell you anything because you'd panic really badly, and it seems she was right," Ayumi chuckled.

Inuyasha sighed, biting his lower lip. After all, it wasn't that Kagome hadn't wanted to see him, she just wasn't able to. That brought a hint of a smile to his lips – it was reassuring. So he still stood a chance.

"Do you think she'll ever have me back?" he asked Kagome's best friend, unable to meet her eyes.

"Unfortunately, yes," she scoffed.

"Hey!" he said in indignation, crossing his arms over his chest.

Suddenly, his little bundle of joy came racing to Aunt Ayumi, throwing herself behind her. Aiko looked very hesitant to look at Inuyasha – he was still a stranger to her, a man she didn't know. This hurt him somewhat, but he knew he shouldn't give it too much thought.

Instead, he dropped to his knees in front of the little girl and decided not to tell her he was her father right away. She would probably be scared out of her wits. What he did do was smile warmly and wait until she disentangled her arms from Ayumi's legs and stepped forward.

"Hello, Aiko, remember me?"

She seemed timid, like she didn't really want to talk to him, but, "You're the weird guy that mommy said was expecting to leave her in the middle of the street without saying much." Well, kids were perceptive like that.

"I was upset that day, I'm sorry. Remember my name?"

The girl shook her head shyly, she was so cute.

"It's Inuyasha. Yours is Aiko, right?"

This time, a wide smile spread over her lips as she nodded enthusiastically. "Uh-huh," she said, "I'm Ai-ko."

"Well, _Ai-ko_, why don't you show me your room, huh?" The girl was overly excited by his request and gripped his wrist to make him follow her. Inuyasha's heart swelled with bliss when his daughter dragged him after her to show him her toys. It was a very important moment in his life that couldn't wait any more.

The little girl showed him her princesses and her princes and her doll house with a bathroom and a living room and a dying room – where Inuyasha corrected her, telling her it was a _dining_ room, not a dying room. She admitted that she loved boys' toys, too, but that she didn't want to tell her mommy, because she might get mad.

Inuyasha memorized this detail, wanting to make sure that his daughter had everything she wanted. Next time he came, he would bring her a helicopter with a remote control so she could have it fly aaaall over the house. That would make Kagome throw a fit, but he didn't care. She'd have to compromise.

He smiled at the thought of them both compromising, like a true husband and wife would.

After a couple of hours, Inuyasha found himself wanting to see Kagome, to make sure she was okay, even if the doctors had made sure to make that happen.

"Honey, stay here and play some more, I'm going to go see mommy, okay?"

The girl nodded, still looking at a particularly beautiful Barbie doll, dressing her up, "Okay, daddy."

Inuyasha froze in the doorstep, trying to figure out if his hearing still worked properly. Ayumi was right in front of him, eyes-wide, rather agape. She knew how Ayumi kept asking about her father, how much she wanted a male figure in her life. But why did she cling so desperately onto Inuyasha? And so soon, too? Ayumi merely shrugged and watched the girl – she didn't seem to realize what she'd said.

"Go," she mouthed at Inuyasha, who was still dazed.

He did as told and entered Kagome's room. The woman he loved looked sound asleep. Smiling at the lovely view, he sat on the edge of her bed right next to her, content to just watcher. She was the same beauty, the same warm soul he had fallen in love with. Life wasn't always peachy, he knew that, but it had its way of putting things back together. Life was a puzzle that had to be solved.

"I'm sorry for everything I did…" His words were smooth, calm, but he was a mess on the inside. He wanted to tell her these things in person, he wanted her to know how hard it had been for him, but he was too much of a coward still.

"I'm a coward, aren't I, Kagome?"

She didn't answer. Of course she didn't answer. She was asleep.

"You have no idea how terrible I felt about myself when I realized I'd fallen in love with you and I was still married to Kikyou. I felt like I was betraying both of you, but I figured I should at least choose the least of the two evils. I chose betraying Kikyou, because I didn't love her anymore, and because I knew she didn't love me either. It was easier that way, easier not to stop seeing you, easier to fall deeper in love with you, easier to make promises I was intent on keeping."

Gods, why was this so hard? "I… when she wouldn't give me the divorce I thought I was going to die. I kept pushing, and pushing, and… until she finally relented. That day was one of the happiest days of my life." Inuyasha shook his head and chuckled at the irony. He was confessing to Kagome while she was sleeping. That was pretty stupid. Stupid, stupid, stupid, but, "I love you still. I love you so, so very much, and I can't begin to tell you how happy I am you haven't sought solace in another's arms. I'm jealous like that, even if I know I don't have the right to be. I just… I want you back. I want you for myself. Is that selfish? Maybe it is, but I do. Come back to me, Kagome."

He traced her brow with a slender finger, her skin was still so smooth to the touch. Kagome was perfect.

"Out daughter called me daddy today, I don't know why, but she did. Is that normal? Was the way my heart beat and my breath caught normal? It was the first time she called me that, even not knowing I am her real dad. Is she that eager to have a father? Would she have called anyone that?" It was frustrating, "Kami-sama, Kagome, wake up, please. I want to kiss you."

But she didn't say anything. It was probably his imagination, but he thought her breath was normal, like she wasn't asleep at all. But that couldn't be, right?

So he figured she wouldn't mind if he kissed her. After all, she wouldn't feel it, she'd sleep right through it. Slowly, gently, he hovered above her and hesitated for a second before brushing her lips with his tentatively. Tingles shot through his entire body and he smiled against her mouth. This was so good, so sweet.

He realized he couldn't stay like this for too long, so he dragged his tongue over her bottom lip slowly, gently, relishing her taste before leaving. He wouldn't forget this moment. He still had a chance. He could win his family back.

Right after he left, two misty eyes opened swiftly.

* * *

"So you kissed her while she was sleeping?" Sesshomaru asked skeptically. Well, it didn't sound as good as it had felt the way Sesshomaru put it, but it didn't matter. Inuyasha was so certain Kagome would forgive him that not even Sesshomaru could crush his high hopes. Surprisingly, the older brother didn't even try doing that.

"Yeah, and it was amazing."

"I don't need details, I merely asked you if you kissed her while she was _not awake_."

Well, yeah, of course, he'd said that, hadn't he, "Sure." Inuyasha shrugged. He'd had a whole night to think about it, and the kiss really seemed right. After all, Kagome didn't know about it, and he felt better now. He had no remorse whatsoever. Today he'd visit her again, and hopefully, she'd be awake this time.

"Baka," his brother scolded, but Inuyasha merely shrugged. Yeah, yeah, baka. Why not? Being a baka brought him so many advantages sometimes.

"So, how's the kid?"

"_Rin_ is fine. She's asking for you," Sesshomaru replied firmly.

"I'll come visit one of these days. I just want to settle things with Kagome. Not right now, but I don't know, in time. I'm going to buy Aiko a helicopter," he announced enthusiastically, missing Sesshomaru's cocked eyebrow.

"Isn't she a bit young for such extravagant gifts?"

"Not a real one, _idiot_. A toy one. With a remote control. She's gonna love it."

Sesshomaru pursed his lips. Really, did he have to teach Inuyasha everything? "Inuyasha, girls like dolls."

"Yeah, I know, but Aiko likes boys' toys as well, it's just that she hasn't had the guts to tell Kagome yet," he explained, proud that the girl had seen fit to tell him and not her mother. He was gaining ground, wasn't he? He supposed he should be grateful that the child wasn't afraid of him or something – that would've been really terrible.

"Hey, did I tell you she called me 'daddy'?" Inuyasha asked excitedly, watching Sesshomaru as he calmly inspected some contracts.

"Only for the hundredth time today," the older brother answered casually. His eyes narrowed a bit and he flicked through the pages quickly, but Inuyasha didn't pay attention – he was scowling.

"What do you feel about Akitoki Houjo?" Sesshomaru asked all of a sudden, pursing his lips while underlining something from the contract with his pencil.

"The one with the stupid gifts? Nice guy, I like him, why?"

"He's going to die," Sesshomaru said seriously and Inuyasha almost believed him. Almost. He knew what happened to people Sesshomaru declared were going to 'die' – they were going to spend the rest of their lives in prison.

"Why, what?"

"He thinks doing money laundering inside my company is fun," Sesshomaru answered gravely and Inuyasha didn't ask more. His brother was pissed and it was best if he left him to his own devices. After all, he had his own problems to take care of.


	7. Destroyed Happiness 7

**Destroyed happiness**

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Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha, and I do not make money off my stories**.**

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**_A/N: I don't believe I mentioned this, but this story has won 2nd Place as Best Angst Fiction at Feudal Association, dec 2009. I'm so grateful for that, and__ want to thank those who nominated and voted it :D_**

**_Also, I'm sorry for taking so long in updating, but I've been busy :) I hope you'll enjoy the chapter. Read and please review :D_**

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Kagome desperately tried to soothe her raging nerves by eating some peppermint ice cream, her favorite. This was an important day and the mere knowledge made her want to rummage through the bathroom cabinet in search of some really potent calming pills. Of course, Ayumi had made sure to take all of those away, so Kagome wouldn't be tempted, especially with all this stress she was constantly under.

If she didn't know better, Kagome would think that Ayumi had planned all this to torture her.

Still.

She didn't know what to make of Inuyasha's confession. Naturally, it wasn't right that she'd listened to it pretending she was asleep, but she had been truly curious of what he'd do when he'd entered her room. And his words had frozen her.

He still loved her, but she already knew that. He wanted her back and was willing to fight for that. He also wanted to be as close to Aiko as possible, and he believed in their love.

Inuyasha knew she loved him.

So what to do? The insecurities were less strong than before, but she still wasn't sure how she was supposed to react, how to let their relationship progress. Was there a relationship to begin with?

Her thoughts scrambled away hastily when she heard the door bell. It was ten thirty. Ayumi was supposed to come at eleven, but perhaps she was early. Sighing before quickly checking on Aiko, who was silently playing with her dolls, Kagome rushed to open the door, stiffening after doing so.

"Hi," _he_ said with a tense smile, scratching his nape nervously. "Umm… I suppose Aiko's home, isn't she?"

Kagome merely nodded dumbly, staring at her ex husband as if she were witnessing the death of a Viking _ghost_. Her eyes hazily traveled to his hand, where he had a big box – a toy. She squinted when it looked like there was a helicopter there – honestly, was Inuyasha _that_ clueless when it came to what sort of toys little girls preferred?

"Can I come in?" he asked in a small voice, every unsure movement betraying his uneasiness. She didn't want to make things harder for him, so she stepped aside, looking at her bedroom, where Aiko was playing quietly. The little girl had pigtails and was wearing a colorful dress as her Barbie chased Ken around.

"Look," he started with a sigh. "I know you probably don't want to have much to do with me right now, but I want to be there for Aiko, okay?" His eyes glinted suspiciously and she said nothing. She couldn't. His intentions were clear because she could read between the lines, so she was aware that he wanted them to go one step at a time, not to rush things, and to prove his worth. Today he was here for Aiko, and perhaps the next day he'd come for _her_.

Whatever happened, Kagome would not stand in the way of a father and his child.

"She's right there," Kagome told him with a smile, pointing towards her bedroom. Inuyasha smiled in response and grabbed the box with his other hand, approaching the familiar room.

As soon as she saw him, Aiko was all smiles.

"Hey there, Aiko," he greeted, crouching in front of her and watching her grip her Barbie by the long gown.

"Inuyasha!" she exclaimed happily. The kid was just so ecstatic when she knew who she was talking to. Though the disappointment was piercing. He wanted her to keep calling him daddy, but why should she? The first time had been a slip-up. She was probably merely more familiar with him, now that she'd shown him her toys and shared with him her secret.

"I've got something for you," he told her, letting her discover the surprise for herself.

Without waiting for him to show her the box, Aiko grabbed it and started ripping it. When she couldn't, he gave her a hand. Soon, she was staring at her new helicopter.

"Look, it has a remote control, and you can fly it around the house," Inuyasha told her, showing her how to control the flying object. She tried it herself a few times, knocking down a few vases her mother had in the process. Kagome glared at them while Aiko was elated.

"I can't believe you did that!" Kagome snapped at her husband – _**Ex**__ husband; why do I keep thinking that?_ – and went to take the remote control out of Aiko's hands. She didn't know what to do to prevent the girl from crying, so she decided to make a pact.

"Look, sweetie. Mommy can't have you ruining my room, so you're going to have to play in the living room, okay?" Aiko nodded happily, holding the huge toy to her chest and struggling with carrying it, refusing to get help. "And you, _mister_," Kagome said angrily, turning to Inuyasha, "what were you thinking when you bought her that? Girls like dolls. _Aiko_ likes dolls," she pointed out matter-of-factly with crossed arms.

"Well, she liked it," Inuyasha said stubbornly, becoming increasingly irritated.

"She _pretended_ to like it because she doesn't want you to feel bad," Kagome lied to herself. She'd seen Aiko's happy look when she'd received the helicopter, which came as a shock.

"Dammit woman, stop talking shit. My head hurts," Inuyasha scowled, his brows furrowing. He didn't realize how close he'd sounded to when they were still married, but she certainly did. Kagome was breathless. Inuyasha was so familiar around her that she couldn't help but let old times envelop her mind. Memories when Inuyasha would hold her all day long and make her feel treasured. Memories of their fights, of every time they made up, of their life together.

She missed it.

But she shrugged it off.

"Stop cursing around the child!" Kagome had always been sure that Inuyasha couldn't stop cuss words from flowing out of his mouth even with his children around. It seemed she had assumed right.

"She can't hear!" he snapped back, frowning in an annoyed fashion.

"Well if you didn't bring Aiko a helicopter that will surely destroy the whole apartment you wouldn't have me snapping at you," she argued fiercely, her face slightly red.

"Yeah, yeah," he flicked her off, "you always say things like that. Look, I wanna go play with _my daughter_." Just like that, he joined Aiko in tearing-the-whole-place-apart process.

And Kagome was strangely happy.

* * *

Ayumi arrived at eleven o'clock just as promised, surprised to see Inuyasha was already there. Boy, was that man a morning person.

"Hi sweetheart," she told Kagome with a warm smile, though her eyes were glued to Inuyasha interacting with his daughter even while hugging her best friend. "Want some honey?"

"Honey?" Kagome asked with a raised eyebrow. "I thought you hated it."

"Yeah, well… changed my mind." She winked suggestively. "Bankotsu surely knows how to use it to stir my appetite."

Appalled, Kagome ran a hand down her face, unwilling to hear any more details of Ayumi's sex life. "Please, say no more," she joked, enjoying her friend's amused smile. Inuyasha seemed oblivious to their chat, so she decided not to disturb them. It was truly a miracle that the little girl didn't dislike him – after all, he was a stranger. But Inuyasha had always had some sort of charm that attracted kids to him; his niece Rin was living proof.

"So, you let him come?" Ayumi asked uncomfortably, opening a subject that Kagome was not yet ready to discuss.

"Yes. Nothing will happen. He's Aiko's father – it's only fair."

Ayumi wanted to retort, but shook her head instead; it wouldn't be worth it. Maybe Kagome would realize meanwhile that Inuyasha coming to visit his daughter could only mean one thing – their relationship was progressing. While it was not much of a relationship yet, Ayumi could clearly see both adults' desire to be with each other. It was so easy to know these things when you knew both sides of the story.

And suddenly, a wicked idea occurred to her. A weird glint captured her dark orbs, making Kagome gulp. The intensity of that look was famous, and Kagome didn't have to guess in order to know that Ayumi was planning something. Ayumi was obviously planning something that involved her. And by the quick glance that her best-friend-recently-turned-into-a-sex-kitten threw at the living room, Kagome could only assume it involved Inuyasha, as well. And potentially even Aiko. She _hoped_ it involved Aiko, too.

No matter what, Kagome just couldn't say no to her friend.

"Bankotsu had an idea," Ayumi lied slyly. "He wants to double date."

Kagome's mouth went dry. She knew what this meant.

"No," she interjected harshly. But Ayumi was having none of it.

Shaking her head, the woman smirked cockily. "And of course I told him I knew the perfect person for it. You're the only friend that would do something like this for me, aren't you?"

Again, Kagome clearly stated her intentions: "No, I am not."

"And," Ayumi kept ignoring her deliberately, "since you don't have anyone, we might as well ask Inuyasha to come."

That was it. Kagome snapped.

"No, we will not!"

Both Inuyasha and Aiko turned their heads at the angry mother and Kagome blushed under their intense, inquisitive stares. "Err, don't mind me – carry on," she said sweetly, rubbing her hands together nervously. Inuyasha didn't miss the familiar gesture, but decided not to interfere.

"Honey, you are so predictable," Ayumi said, stifling a giggle. "You should have seen your face."

"Hahaha, laugh it up, why don't you?" Kagome's anger was truly a palpable notion. "But I'm not double dating."

Perhaps her voice was too loud, or perhaps Inuyasha had kept his attention focused on Kagome's words, but he heard what she said. Sudden anger towards his ex wife's best friend bubbled up in his chest, but he chose to remain silent. Who was Ayumi to force Kagome on a date? A double date, but still.

"I'm sure Inuyasha won't mind."

Well, of course he would mind! Inuyasha couldn't believe his ears. Ayumi knew he was trying to slowly make a move on Kagome, and here she was suggesting to Kagome to go on a date and telling her he wouldn't mind!

"I'm sure he won't mind, either," Kagome replied sarcastically, rolling her eyes, which Inuyasha didn't see because his back was facing her. But he certainly caught her sour tone, feeling male pride. His woman knew him well. He was aware she was technically no longer his woman, but as far as he was concerned, she'd soon be.

"Honestly, Kagome. Do you think that if we ask Inuyasha to come on a double date he won't? Especially since it'll be you that he'll go out with? Don't tell me you're _that_ ignorant," Ayumi commented with a roll of her eyes.

Unexpectedly, the whole situation changed. Inuyasha dazedly showed Aiko which buttons to push as he pondered on the circumstances. So Kagome didn't want to go on a date with him. Did she not want things to go smoothly between them again?

"It's too soon," he heard her say and suddenly understood. In a way, he agreed with her. He'd made the same decision, too.

Ayumi scowled. "Oh, you cannot mean that!" Grabbing her purse, she rose from the couch and went to the bathroom to pick up some things she'd left a few weeks before. "Girl, if I hear you cry one more time because of your love issue with Inuyasha, I'm out."

Apparently, her voice had been too loud, because Kagome shushed her angrily for fear of having Inuyasha overhear. Ayumi shrugged it off, trying on the new mascara Kagome had purchased before snapping her bag shut.

"So, I suppose we won't be going to the park today, will we?" It was quite obvious, but Kagome nodded anyway.

"I don't know how long Inuyasha will stay, but it's obvious he'll be playing with Aiko for a while longer. Drop by if you need anything," the content mother said with a shrug, rounding the kitchen counter. Ayumi was putting on her shoes when she spotted Kagome tilting her head to the side as she called out to Inuyasha and Aiko, asking them what they wanted for brunch. Inuyasha casually replied that he'd already had breakfast, so she might as well go ahead and cook lunch. In response, Kagome smiled and told him she'd make his favorite, nodding when he thanked her.

It was such a happy family picture that Ayumi was amazed. They weren't even a couple yet and they were already so comfortable with each other.

Maybe it wouldn't take that long to heal.

* * *

Sesshomaru was amazed. Inuyasha was late for two hours. He felt like growling and throwing something at his younger brother, but unfortunately he wasn't there. His cell phone was dead, he didn't answer his phone at home, so he was certainly out. But where?

His questions showed great possibility of being answered when Inuyasha suddenly appeared at his office door. He seemed tired with dark bags under his eyes, but an easy smile was splayed across his lips, leaving the businessman wondering what had brought such a change.

"Why are you so late? We had a meeting two hours ago."

"I was dead tired," the younger brother complained, throwing himself on the armchair in front of Sesshomaru's desk. "You wouldn't believe how much energy Aiko has."

Raising an inquisitive eyebrow, Sesshomaru let Inuyasha know he was curious.

Smiling, the younger man crossed his arms over his chest as he leaned back comfortably. "Kagome had to go to work late in the evening and Ayumi was with her new boyfriend having fun, so she called me to come look after Aiko. Well I went and that little monster kept me up almost until Kagome came back," he complained affectionately. "I tried to get her to sleep, but she simply wouldn't. She slept at noon, she kept saying."

Sesshomaru was quite intrigued. The little girl seemed attached to Inuyasha for some reason and it was absolutely astonishing.

"Oh, and yesterday morning I went to Kagome to play with Aiko, too. So basically I spent my whole day with my daughter. How the Hell wouldn't I be tired?"

Well, it certainly explained things, and Sesshomaru was going to let him go with it this once. But only because he was not in the mood for arguments.

Then someone knocked at the door and Inuyasha sat up straight.

"Come in," Sesshomaru said sternly as the trembling figure of a too kind-looking Akitoki Houjo appeared in the doorway.

"You might as well turn around and leave, Mr. Akitoki, if you value your well-being," Sesshomaru threatened, glaring daggers at the obviously terrified man.

"Please Mr. Taisho, I was forced to do it."

"That's too bad. You should have told me about it, but you didn't. Therefore, you will lose your job and be prosecuted."

The man started trembling even harder if it was possible – Inuyasha felt sorry for him.

"I didn't want to do it, I swear," he pleaded.

"You're going to have to tell the judge about that," Sesshomaru said nonchalantly, picking up a few papers and making a show out of reading them attentively, intent on partially ignoring the soon-to-be ex employee.

"It was this company, and they told me that-" The man stopped when Sesshomaru tilted his head to watch him.

"Mr. Akitoki," he said coldly, "do I look like I care?"

Houjo swallowed and shook his head, rubbing his thigh with a sweaty palm.

"I suggest you leave now," Inuyasha said soothingly, trying to calm the raging waters.

"Y-Yes," the man said with a nod and dashed out of the room.

"What a cretin," Sesshomaru commented as Inuyasha sighed.

"The guy's scared – who knows what they did to him? I never believed him capable of doing such a thing."

"Well, it is not my business. If he is truly innocent, then he will be able to prove it."

Inuyasha smiled, knowing that is brother was right. Maybe their lives were changing now. "You're right. So… how's Rin?"


	8. Destroyed Happiness 8

**Destroyed happiness**

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Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha, and I do not make money off my stories**.**

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**_A/N: I haven't been around for a while, but now I'm back and eager to write some more. I know I might be speeding things up, but I sooooo wanted to add some fluff to this story :) Enjoy and please _review_.  
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They were blinded by worry. When Kagome had found Aiko, her heart had stopped in its tracks. The jolt of the obvious fall from the tree had knocked the child unconscious and the hectic mother screamed for help. It had only been a couple of minutes that she had left her daughter alone to play in the sand while she had gone to buy her that vanilla ice-cream she loved so much and upon returning…

Now her shoulders quivered desperately as she clutched Inuyasha's shirt, letting her tears wet it. She was more upset with herself than with Aiko. The girl was young – climbing trees probably seemed fun. Irresponsible mother – that was what she was.

Inuyasha rubbed her back soothingly, tears coating his eyes, as well, but he tried to stay strong for both of them. They said Aiko was still unconscious, but so much time had passed. People died from tree falls; he could only hope this would not be his daughter's tragic end. That would be entirely too cruel.

"It's not your fault," he whispered for the hundredth time that day, but still felt Kagome shake her had against his chest. It was obvious she didn't share his opinion.

"Come on, Kagome, she's gonna wake up any moment now. Do you want her to see you crying?" But his words seemed to only upset the woman further, because her fingers tightened on the soft fabric clutched between them, Kagome's body pressed against Inuyasha's.

He didn't blame her. Aiko was rather boyish, and he knew climbing trees were spiked a child's curiosity. But Kagome had seen Aiko fall from the corner of her eyes, she had found her on the ground, she had… she just had to live with that horrifying image.

"She's a child; children do that," he said soothingly, but his words were strained, as if he could barely keep tears in.

Kagome's puffy eyes rose to meet his moist ones – his heart ached inside his chest at the tragic, desperate look she gave him.

"Can you honestly say it's not my fault?!" she demanded frantically, biting her lower lip harshly. "Can you say that it was okay I left her there all by herself?" She was punishing herself now. "Was it okay that I never ever thought about telling her not to climb trees because they're dangerous? Especially those in the park, since they're so big?"

"Yes," he said sincerely, looking her in the eyes and she faltered for a second upon seeing the sincerity swimming in his liquid orbs.

"O… kay," she whispered, burying her face into his chest once again. His hand automatically went to wrap itself around her shoulders, holding her as close to him as possible, determined to comfort her. Truthfully, he was as scared as she was, but there was nothing to be done about it. Now they simply had to wait.

And hours went by, with them not even thinking about heading home to take a shower, Sesshomaru and Rin came, Ayumi came, they left, they came back – it was all a blur. Then the doctor that tended to their daughter came with a file in her hand, her face emotionless. It was disturbing, but better than a grimace or a sad expression – it meant hope was plausible.

"Your daughter is not in danger of losing her life," the middle-aged woman said kindly, he face still not showing any emotions. "But we will have to keep her here for at least a week and a half."

Inuyasha nodded anxiously, rubbing Kagome's head soothingly. "Sure, no problem."

"Is there anything else wrong with her?" Kagome asked weakly between sobs.

The woman looked at her almost cautiously. "I am not sure. I'd like to keep her here for a week and a half, as I said. Then we'll see what happens, I still have to run some tests."

After she left, Kagome's eyes were wide and stuck on the retreating figure. "What does she mean, she doesn't know? She's a doctor, isn't she?"

"Yes," Inuyasha countered, "she's _just_ a doctor." He wasn't annoyed – just tired. "Look, Kagome. She's doing what she can and we're going to do what we can, as well. Everything will be fine. Trust me," he said without thinking, but for a first time in long she didn't react to the words. A smile threatened to overtake him even in that difficult situation. He had a chance, and things seemed they would fix themselves soon.

Kagome was comforted by Inuyasha's words; he'd always had a way to calm her no matter the situation. Her eyes were closed peacefully as she listened to the rhythm of the heart that beat soothingly inside Inuyasha's chest. Aiko was close and she was okay. Or so the doctor said. Inuyasha was ready to show her he was sorry. She knew she'd already forgiven him, but it was harder to forget. But she'd do it. For them, she'd do it, because being in his arms erased any form of doubt or sadness. In his embrace she felt delicate and powerful at the same time. She felt protected, cared-for.

Her skin tingled where Inuyasha's fingers unconsciously drummed against her arm. Smiles and kisses – that was what they'd shared all those years in the past, and all of a sudden she had the avid urge to do it again. But it would be too soon. She'd be giving her heart to him again too soon, even though that was slightly incorrect since her heart was already filled to the brim with him. Her skin, her flesh wanted him close, but her brain sometimes rebelled.

What if he'd betray her again? What if he'd lie again? What if she'd have her heart broken once again?

But when her mind didn't revolve around Aiko, it was full of thoughts of him, of memories of the two of them by the lake, in the summer light, passionate mornings in their bedroom, magical nights on the balcony… Thoughts like these hurt and left a sweet taste afterwards at the same time. They were welcome and undesired at the same time. She feared and loved them.

She loved him – she _still_ loved him.

"Can we see Aiko?"

Kagome raised her head at Inuyasha's strong, calm voice. She hadn't even noticed the nurse approach.

"Of course."

When they saw her, they were relieved. She didn't look bad, she wasn't injured too badly; Aiko was fine. She was going to be fine. Even if Inuyasha had been equally worried, Kagome was the most comforted.

"Sweetheart, my little girl," Kagome whispered lovingly, tears of joy trailing down her cheeks as her trembling hands caressed her daughter's face. The little thing was strong and she had to stray strong for her mommy and daddy, to bring them closer. "I love you. I love you so much. Mommy and daddy love you, did you hear that?"

When she leaned down to kiss a puffy cheek, she didn't notice Inuyasha's look of astonishment. They seemed like a true family. They acted like a real family… he was so happy.

"Do you want to take a shower? I can stay with her," Inuyasha suggested, rubbing Kagome's back, surprised she didn't flinch away now that Aiko was fine. Kagome didn't need comfort anymore and he was saddened by the thought. However, she surprised him by letting him touch her as if it was nothing unusual.

"No, I'm not leaving her side. Besides, you can take one if you want to." But he didn't. He was content here, with Kagome and Aiko.

"Don't worry about me," he said quietly and Kagome nodded instinctively.

Minutes, hours passed and Kagome found herself curled on Inuyasha's lap, her head resting in the crook of his neck as he played with a few strands of her hair. None of them said anything to disturb the peaceful silence and Aiko hadn't moved for a moment.

His fingers traveled down to her neck unconsciously and he felt her shiver. A pleasant feeling of happiness swirled inside him at the effect he had on her. Maybe she longed for his touch as much as he did. Perhaps she still wanted him the same, intense way he wanted her. His short hair almost stood straight when her dainty fingers settled on his chest, where his shirt had a couple of buttons open. The touch of her fingertips was heavenly and he realized how much he'd missed days like this. He'd missed her truly – with his entire being. The urge to grab her chin and tilt her head upwards so he could kiss her grew too strong and he had to reluctantly take her off his lap and pretend to go to the bathroom so she wouldn't feel offended. In reality, Inuyasha couldn't deal with his own emotions when he held her close and he didn't want to rush things. Well, he did, but he knew it was not appropriate.

When he came back, Kagome realized how incredibly skinnier he was than before. Maybe he had suffered, as Sesshomaru had said. No. It was obvious: he _had_ suffered. He was entirely changed, though no less attractive, because what always brought her to him was his personality, the enticing flavor of his lips. If she continued having such thoughts she'd jump him and that was something she wanted to avoid.

So she turned her head towards her daughter, a good strategy.

Soon the little girl's eyes fluttered open and Kagome released a relieved sigh. Inuyasha was by her side in the blink of an eye and they both explained to Aiko that she'd fallen out of the tree and she had to be more careful the next time. There was no point in reprimanding her.

"I promise," the little girl said simply and Kagome couldn't help but smile.

In the few days they took her home and didn't leave her alone at all. Sometimes they spent their time at Inuyasha's place, sometimes at Kagome's. And one day, Aiko asked something innocently, but her question startled both parents.

She looked at Inuyasha purposefully and asked him, "Are you my daddy?"

He froze and Kagome did, too. It was her call and they knew it. Inuyasha was ready to be called 'father', but if Kagome didn't want to yet, he'd wait.

"Why are you asking this, sweetie?" Kagome interfered, stalling.

"My friends have a daddy that plays with them and brings them toys and cooks when mommy can't. Inuyasha does that, so does it mean he's my daddy?"

Her reasoning was so simple and cute that Kagome couldn't help but smile widely and nod. "Yes honey. Yes, he is your daddy."

"Suuuuper," she exclaimed, something she'd picked up from a boy she played with. In a happy frenzy, the little girl threw her arms around Inuyasha's neck, never noticing his astounded face. His eyes closed on their own when he almost started crying, holding the sweet angel tightly. "Then I'll call you daddy," she decided with a big smile. He nodded at her eagerly, kissing her cheek while looking at a content Kagome.

In the evening, when Sesshomaru and Rin came over for dinner, he suggested they came by one day when he was at Kagome's. They could spend some time together, all five of them, it would be nice. Sesshomaru seemed to consider the idea, but he didn't say anything.

Rin was, of course, more ecstatic than usual, and both men knew it had to do with the drastic change in Inuyasha's behavior. He was no longer moody and depressive – he was full of life and optimism and more playful than ever. Even Sesshomaru was grateful for it. He looked better, too – healthier.

Akitoki Houjo had been found innocent, but Sesshomaru had refused to accept him back. Such a weak person was not fit to work for him. So Akitoki moved to another workplace. Kagome's. Obviously, Inuyasha didn't know it, because there was no reason for Kagome to talk about it. She and Akitoki were simply colleagues, until he asked her to have lunch with him. It wasn't a date; it couldn't be, she figured, since Houjo was too sweet and naïve and… well… he was too Houjo. So she accepted. Why not? She was starving and he was paying – what a wonderful combination.

The cozy restaurant they were in was simple and casual. They talked about things and she found out a great deal about him, including the recent trial he'd suffered. For a few moments she wondered who the mean brothers that had accused him were.

Coincidentally, Inuyasha walked with Aiko just in front of the same restaurant and saw Kagome with Akitoki by accident. Rage bubbled in his veins instantly. They were trying to repair their broken relationship and she was going out with other guys? He tried to think Akitoki was just an acquaintance, but then why had she never mentioned knowing him? And why was she here giggling at his jokes, smiling at him? Without thinking, he dragged Aiko inside and walked intently to their table.

At his not-so-tactful cough Kagome's eyes widened, but she _smiled_. He didn't say anything while she introduced him to Houjo and kissed Aiko's cheek. Inuyasha only looked at Kagome, his daughter's hand still wrapped in his.

"This is Akitoki Houjo," Kagome said.

"I know. He fucked us up," he answered harshly without looking away from her. Akitoki squirmed in mortification next to him, but Inuyasha paid him no mind. Kagome's eyes widened and she looked at Houjo. Inuyasha and Sesshomaru were the two brothers that had 'unjustly' accused him? She knew the story instantly – Inuyasha had briefly told her about Houjo without mentioning any names. And the biggest wonder was that she believed _his_ side of the story. Even if Houjo didn't seem the type of guy to do anything wrong, she believed _Inuyasha_. And it made her smile.

She could trust him again after all.

Her smile never fading, she looked at Houjo and nodded. "You're a liar Akitoki."

"Aww," he complained sheepishly. "How was I supposed to know you were Taisho's? And you have a daughter, too?"

Kagome's eyes narrowed. "What do you mean?"

"I thought things could work out between us," he said lowly, gesturing between them.

Kagome's eyes were wide and horrified, ignorant of Inuyasha's contentment. Judging by her attitude, she hadn't meant for this to be a romantic lunch – just between friends. She had every right to.

"You're a pig. I told you from the beginning I was not interested!" Without bothering to listen to his explanations, she grabbed Aiko's hand but found resistance when she started walking away. Glancing behind, she noticed Inuyasha refusing to come.

"Come on, Inuyasha," she said softly and he immediately followed her. Aiko was between them as they walked, each of small hands in her parents'. The sight was adorable – they looked like a family.

"I can't believe him," Kagome commented sourly. "And he seemed so harmless, too."

"He _is_ harmless," Inuyasha argued. "But that's just because he's so weak and he knows it. He can't even hurt a fly."

"I have to start trusting my instincts," Kagome said, grateful that Inuyasha didn't say anything against her. "I kept feeling I shouldn't go to lunch with him."

"Then why did you?" The question held a small percentage of hostility, but Kagome was more flattered than anything else. Inuyasha cared. Inuyasha cared so much as to barge into a restaurant and risk causing a scene for her. It was almost like before.

"I was hungry," she said as if obvious. "And he offered to pay," she continued and giggled. He had to smile at that.

"I want cocoa biscuits," Aiko said all of a sudden and the two adults were happy to focus on anything else than Akitoki. In what was left of Kagome's lunch break they bought Aiko her favorite cocoa biscuits.

In the same evening, Kagome stood on a bench right in front of her apartment block. It was windy and rather dark despite the street lights, but she didn't care. Inuyasha was up with Aiko, but she didn't feel like going home. She was tired from work and comfortable there, on the bench.

Her thoughts were chaotic and she thought about sorting them out when she felt a cold hand touch her bare shoulder. Her eyes collided with Inuyasha's and she remained still for a while.

"How did you know I was here?"

"I saw you through the window" was his answer. Then they were silent.

After a couple of minutes, his arm was around her shoulders to keep her warm when she started trembling. Soon she was nestled on his lap, her eyes closed comfortably. Aiko was asleep, he'd told her, so they shouldn't worry. They could do whatever.

Her breath tickled his skin through the shirt and he told her that so she could move her head a bit to the side. There were stars, many stars on the dark sky and they were all sparkling brightly. The moon was full, romantic.

"I love you," he said unexpectedly, shattering the silence and the magic. Kagome started trembling in his arms from the intensity of his simple statement and he hugged her tighter. She didn't have to say anything, he wanted to say, and she knew it, of course. So she didn't say anything in return, even though he knew the answer. Without having to ask, he knew she loved him too.


	9. Destroyed Happiness 9

**Destroyed happiness**

* * *

Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha, and I do not make money off my stories.

* * *

Honestly, what should he have expected? To have her flying right into his arms when their so-called relationship was still so frail and hazy? To have her lips press upon his with the same ardent passion as they once shared? Or perhaps to spend the rest of his life with her, with their child? As far as he was concerned, he considered his penance paid. He'd suffered for his lies and for the misunderstandings his idiocy had caused, but really? Why was she still so cold?

"Are you having second thoughts?"

"Hm?" The seemingly troubled woman turned her head towards Inuyasha only to see him look at her with something unrecognizable in his eyes. Was that… No, she didn't want to say anything before knowing for sure. What was that mad flicker in his eyes?

Confusion wrapped around her like a woolen blanket, and she wasn't even cold to begin with. Perhaps life was trying to screw her up for her indecision, because, yes, she was aware that she was simply unable to let go of the past.

_What's wrong with me?_

Two months had passed. Two months since she had heard the confirmation that Inuyasha still loved her, and that he was willing to help rebuild their life. But so far they had only managed to spend more time with Aiko. Together, but apart. Was that how the rest of their lives would be?

_Why can't I forget? I forgave him, he certainly forgave me, but…_

It was because of the memories. The haunting, blasted memories that wouldn't let her sleep at night. As she lay in bed trying to rest, thoughts and ideas and memories would come unexpectedly, trapping her and stealing her air. She couldn't breathe. At night, she couldn't make up her mind. And consequently, she couldn't make any decisions during daytime, either.

Kagome was torn between staying away from Inuyasha and having him as close as possible. She wanted him in her life, but out of it as well. She didn't want to decide. If she thought about it more, perhaps she _didn't_ want to forget.

Did she?

_I'm torturing both of us, and Aiko…_

The little girl just couldn't understand why her mommy and daddy didn't live together just like the other children's did. Kagome had lied, saying that Inuyasha had a job in a farther place, mainly because Aiko was too young to understand. She couldn't burden the sweet little soul with 'adult problems'. They had to solve this by themselves.

But how?

"Hey, are you paying attention?"

Kagome snapped out of her thoughts when she felt his hand shake her shoulder. Her couch was comfortable, but now it seemed cold as they sat next to each other. She realized she must have lost herself to her problems.

"Sorry, what did you say?"

"We really need to talk."

His face was so serious and his eyes were too intense for her liking. She feared talking to him, she really didn't want to do it now – perhaps some other time, but why now? The next day would be as good a time as any other, right?

"I'm sorry, my head aches a bit and I'd rather-"

"No, Kagome, your head doesn't hurt," Inuyasha cut her off matter-of-factly and perhaps even a bit ticked off – what had she expected? He still knew her better than anyone. "And we _are_ going to have this talk, because I'm sick of it."

She gulped, mostly because it was the only way of expressing the true way she felt without him noticing. Or perhaps how her hands trembled and how her palms were sweating would betray her?

"You're sick of what?" She was playing the innocent card; she was aware of it, not that Inuyasha wasn't, too, but honestly, what other choice did she have? Stalling was what she was going for.

"Don't play games. I've don't know what else you need to get over this. Face it, Kagome, I've never cheated on you, you have never cheated on me, we have a beautiful, sweet, _smart_ daughter – that may soon realize things are more complicated than you make them to be – and you need to pull your mind off from wherever you keep it, because things can't stay like this anymore. I'm tired. I'm honestly," he whispered with a frown, his eyes almost closed, "sincerely, truly tired, and I can't keep up with you anymore."

"Keep up with me?" It was her turn to frown.

"You keep throwing things at me and expecting me to deal with them. I can't do it anymore. I'm… a human being. People make mistakes Kagome, and they atone. Haven't I atoned for mine?"

If she didn't know better, she would have said he was close to tears, but he was really simply weary. Worn out.

A sigh escaped her lips as her eyes collided with her lap. Why couldn't she look him in the eyes anymore?

"I'm sorry…"

The words tasted bitter, but it was to be expected. Why had she been so deliberately selfish? Had it been to punish him? Certainly not. Herself? Maybe. A bit, but no, not that either. So when Kagome thought more about it, how come she couldn't come up with any answers? The best way to go about things was to pour out her heart.

"It's not that I can't forgive you, because I already have, it's just…" Without her realizing, a few stray tears trickled down her otherwise dry cheeks. Her doe-like eyes looked at him sheepishly, as if he held all the answers in the world. "Why can't I forget?" Her question was mostly whispered and Inuyasha had to strain his ears to pick it up, but when he did his heart thumped faster.

He understood now. The memories, they had to be really ugly. How would _he_ have reacted if a man had come barging through their door claiming he wanted a divorce from _his_ wife? Would he have been as forgiving? Even if things had been clarified, it was still hard to grasp, hard to… imagine what she had been through.

"It's just," she continued, "when I left I didn't know what to think. Would you do this with any other woman? Would I wake up one day and find you married to _another_ woman? A third one? Would I even find out? Because if she hadn't come looking for you, Kikyou would have never found out, would she? It was so hard, thinking about those things when all I wanted to do is stay in your arms and have you whisper to me that it would all be all right. I wanted to be with you so much, but it was so impossible at the time and… it was just so hard when I found out I was pregnant."

His heart clenched inside his chest at that thought. It was always the reminder that he had never seen his daughter when she was just a baby. He hadn't heard her say her first words, hadn't been there to see her take her first steps. Hadn't taught her anything, really, except for these last months, when they had been closer than ever. His relationship with his little angel perhaps overcame even Kagome's with her. Even if she was Aiko's mother, Inuyasha had so much to make up for and he spent all the more time with Aiko.

"It was hard calling you, it took a while. Ayumi kept telling me I shouldn't, I shouldn't, but… I had to. I wanted to. And when Sesshomaru picked up I almost lost my nerve. My voice was trembling so hard; I was a wreck. And Sesshomaru, the way he worded it... I thought you'd left for good. I thought it would be too hard to bring you back. I thought you wanted to be away from everything. So I took the easy way out. I let myself think you didn't want anything to do with me, and… you know the rest."

Yes, he did know the rest.

"So you can't forget," he repeated, avoiding her gaze, even though he didn't have to, because she was doing the same.

She didn't bother to answer; she just nodded, and he didn't see it, but felt it instead.

"I don't know what to do, Kagome. I can't… I don't want to go on like this."

Panic overtook her like an earthquake meant to rattle her whole world. Did he mean he was done trying?

"You have to try harder, I… I don't know how much more I can take." And it wasn't just drama... it was pure torture for him to have her within touching distance and not being able to express himself as he should. He wanted to be able to call her his again, to have her by his side always. Always. He wanted vows, promises of joy and trust and being together. If she couldn't give him that, then why should he still try so hard?

"What do you mean? You're not thinking-"

"I don't know what I'm thinking anymore, Kagome," he cut her off. "I just... I wish you made up your mind. I wish you were ready to take a step forward."

As suddenly as something unexpected could happen, Kagome's mind conjured up an answer that should have been clear from the very beginning. It held such logic, it was so natural that she wondered how she hadn't thought about it earlier.

Brilliantly, with a smile Inuyasha hadn't seen in a long time, Kagome put her hand on his larger one on his thigh.

"I know what I have to do."

He smiled, too, mostly because he was eager to solve their problems, but he was curious, as well.

"Kikyou," she said simply, a smile on her lips, and Inuyasha raised a dark eyebrow.

"Sorry?"

"I have to find Kikyou and talk to her."

She was determined, it showed.

"Why?" His voice was shaky – what if that made things worse? What if it exterminated every chance to get her back? Kikyou was not a bad woman, but maybe she was bitter about him?

"I have to sit through her part of the story. I just have to; I feel it deep inside me. Right here," she said and flattened his palm before pressing it against her chest to let him feel the beating of her heart. "I have to know everything and to hear it once again before I can forget. It's just… a necessity. I think it's what I've been missing."

He sighed. Honestly, he didn't care too much about her decision, but if it brought her back to him, then why ever not?

~*~*~*~

It wasn't hard for them to find her. After all, she was married to a relatively well-known man and they had two cute twins together. Naturally, they were adopted, but Kagome was convinced Kikyou was a good mother.

It wasn't surprising that Kikyou accepted the invitation to lunch – Kagome decided it; dinner would have been a bit too out of line. The woman's unconcealed surprise didn't come as a shock either – she was entitled to any type of emotion of the sort.

"Inuyasha," Kikyou said with a nod as she put her bag on a chair and placed her coat on the back rest then sat down. "Kagome," she said next, looking at the woman with hidden emotions.

"Kikyou," Kagome spoke first, "it was my idea to have lunch together."

Straight to the point.

Inuyasha pursed his lips – how long would it be till something happened and it all went down the toilet? He was sure it would happen like that. It always did.

Kikyou sighed, crossing her arms over her chest defensively as she leaned back. "Inuyasha and I are history. I'm married now, you already know that."

Kagome nodded. "Yes, I do. I just… can you tell me about it once again?"

Kikyou's perfect eyebrow flicked upwards. "What do you mean?"

"Tell me about your marriage. Tell me about… tell me what happened."

The woman sitting across them nodded wordlessly, looking as if she was raking her brain to collect long-lost memories. It was funny, because what Kikyou was desperately trying to remember now was haunting Kagome's every step.

"We were married and our relationship was visibly falling apart, but neither of us did anything about it. Then Inuyasha started spending more and more time away from home, coming later and later until sometimes he wouldn't come at all. I suspected he was having an affair, but I didn't want to think about it. At first it hurt, but then I grew used to it, mainly because I had become accustomed. So when he came home saying he wanted a divorce, I stalled. At first I didn't want to hear about it, then he kept pushing and pushing and I finally noticed how desperate he was, so I decided to give it to him. But there were a few issues, and after a few years from that supposed divorce I found out I couldn't marry because the papers weren't okay."

"What about in between?" Kagome asked, remembering about that one "date" Inuyasha and Kikyou had shared.

"Oh, well…" Was it just her or Kikyou was blushing? "We agreed to talk about things, and… well, it wasn't exactly a date, even though for me it did seem like one. After all, I had been his wife and it was hard to be friends with a man you had once loved, do you understand?"

Kagome supposed she did… and her heart felt lighter.

"That's all?" Kagome asked with a smile that Kikyou returned.

"It is," the other woman nodded.

Then they talked about small stuff, and once in a while Inuyasha participated in the conversation, but otherwise he just stood there, amazed at how smoothly things had gone.

Was this it? Would this be their chance?

~*~*~*~

The little girl was so incredibly sweet and his heart soared so high whenever she called him 'daddy'. His happiness exceeded normal boundaries and it should be considered illegal, but he didn't care. He took her into his arms and swung her in the air, making her giggle. The most precious thing in the world – that was what she was. Part of him and Kagome. Part of what had brought them together, part of their future.

"It's cold outside," Kagome said as she entered his apartment – honestly, one could call it hers as well; she spent more time there than at her place anyway. "It's raining, too," she added, closing her umbrella and taking off her wet shoes and coat. Her smile was bright when she saw the father and daughter interact.

"Welcome home, mommy," he joked, putting Aiko down so she could give her mommy a big, fat, juicy kiss.

"Good to be home," she joked back but their hearts skipped a simultaneous beat. "Did you play nice?' Kagome asked Aiko, since the little devil had the tendency to play unfair and they were trying to teach her she should always be correct.

"Yes, mommy."

"Really?" Inuyasha questioned from behind and blood rushed to the girl's cheeks. Her father wasn't angry, but his tone was serious so she knew not to lie.

"Well…" she said, avoiding her mother's gaze. When Kagome ruffled her hair however, little Aiko looked upwards with a moist smile.

"Don't worry. You'll learn," Kagome said, kissing her daughter's forehead. "What about you?" This time, the woman's eyes met Inuyasha's.

"I've been a good boy," he answered playfully. It had only been a couple of days since the meeting with Kikyou and things were already going way better.

"Okay then, let's put this little girl to sleep," Kagome said with a lighthearted glint in her eyes and Aiko shrieked before running to her new bedroom, her mother following closely behind. It wasn't long before the little girl was tickled to sleep.

"You sure know how to wear her out," Inuyasha commented, stroking Kagome's hair as her head rested on his lap on the couch. They were "watching TV". Truthfully, Kagome was much too tired and had asked Inuyasha to lend her his lap for comfort.

"I'm her mother. What do you expect?" she murmured sleepily.

"Hey," Inuyasha said almost childishly. "I have an idea." Without warning, he shook his legs, effectively nudging her head and chasing away her drowsiness.

"What was that for?" she asked with a frown, rubbing her eyes and the back of her head.

"Come with me," he urged, grabbing his keys and dragging her by the wrist.

"Aiko's alone and-" Kagome started to protest, but Inuyasha cut her off immediately.

"She's asleep."

"I'm in my slippers," she argued as he dragged her through the door and locked it behind them. "Inuyasha, it's cold outside."

"Shut up, Kagome," he said affectionately, "you're coming with me and that's that."

She grunted, trying to deny the fact that her blood was pumping furiously throughout her veins.

Together they sped up the stairs and reached the rooftop. It was dark and thousands of little, glimmering flickers lit the universe developing before their eyes. Kagome's breath was caught in her throat at the beauty of the still evening and she didn't even notice Inuyasha's embrace – it simply felt natural.

His arms wrapped around her waist, Inuyasha placed his lips on her neck, closing his eyes in pure contentment. He didn't know if she'd allow him more contact, but it was enough. This was enough.

_How I've missed this…_

Without realizing, Kagome's arm wrapped itself around Inuyasha's neck, but her eyes didn't stray from the beauty of the dark city. His breath was searing upon her sensitive skin and her spine tingled with excited shivers, but she couldn't comprehend it. A moist tongue flicked out to taste her sweetness and Kagome closed her eyes abruptly, melting into him completely, counting on him to support her body. Her head tilted to the side to grant him more access and a small smile tugged at her lips until it conquered them.

"I love you."

This time, it was she who said it, but Inuyasha didn't stop as she'd thought she would. Instead, he continued to rain kisses on her neck, hungry for more. His right hand pulled up the hem of her shirt to touch bare skin and her smile grew as she caressed his nape, a sensitive spot for him. He nipped her skin as a reward, holding her closer.

"I've missed this," he said, brushing his lips against her earlobe.

"I've missed it, too," she whispered back.

"I want to have you as my wife again. You'll be the only one. It's always been you, Kagome."

Surprisingly, she didn't freak out at the idea.

"I want to be your wife, too."

And they both knew their days together would grow into something beyond their imagination.


	10. Epilogue

**Destroyed happiness**

* * *

Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha, and I do not make money off my stories.

* * *

**Epilogue**

Her hormones were a complete mess.

If there was one thing she had wanted to never experience again, it was the mood swings from when she'd been pregnant with Aiko, but fate had a twisted sense of humor, blessing her with yet another child, and therefore, another set of uncertain dispositions. She was truly happy, of course – Inuyasha was _ecstatic_ – but she could do without the unnecessary pains and discomfort. It was a good thing Sesshomaru had taken Inuyasha as a partner again – after a period of pause – and seeing as business went fairly good, her _husband_ didn't have to work too much and could spend time with his family quietly.

It was a blessing when it came to her needs.

He didn't leave her unsupervised one second when he was at home. Even when he was playing with Aiko he kept glancing in her way, making sure she was okay. It was sweet and annoying at the same time, but she supposed he couldn't help it. He'd missed the birth of one child; he didn't want to miss a moment of his second.

He had a new secretary now. She was blond, Caucasian, long, creamy legs, and boob job. Frankly, Kagome couldn't care less. The woman had a nice resume and that was the only reason why Inuyasha had hired her. She was fairly competent, too, Inuyasha had mentioned.

Right now it was becoming easy to keep her balance as Aiko was trying to show her what she'd made at sculpture classes. She was seven years old and too smart for her age. She already knew what sex was – and had walked in on her parents doing it countless times to their immense embarrassment – so Inuyasha protected her like crazy, even though he knew she was still too young for that. It made Kagome laugh every time.

Once more, the pregnant mother was amazed by her daughter's talent, staring at the beautifully carved man. The details were so striking, so perfectly done for a girl her age that Kagome wondered where she'd learned it from. And why would she choose to sculpt a _man_? It was official. Aiko would become a heartbreaker.

"Beautiful, sweetie," Kagome told her daughter, kissing her forehead motherly before grabbing her purse. "Are you sure you don't want to come with me?"

"No, I told Sango I would go play with her today. Her mother bought her a Barbie house!" Aiko said, as if envious, although she already had three of them.

"I thought you only liked boys' toys," Kagome teased, seeing her daughter cringe. There had been a period in Aiko's life when she had only played with toys meant for boys, but that period had passed. Still, Kagome never missed the chance to taunt her about it.

"Mama!"

"Alright, sweetie. Play fair," Kagome laughed, slipping on her shoes with great difficulty then heading to visit her husband at his workplace. It wasn't often that she did this, mainly because he got angry that she left the house whenever she did, but she _really_ missed him.

Everyone at the company greeted her politely, some jealous, some admiring her – Kagome didn't mind. As long as there was love between her and Inuyasha, there would be no shadow in her world.

Inuyasha's new secretary was trying hard not to frown when Kagome appeared, she noticed, although the blond kept talking on the phone as if nothing was happening. True, Kagome was still rather far from the office; now an old lady was asking her about the baby and she was barely paying attention, most of it focused on that new secretary.

"Mingxia," the blond was saying rather loudly, "I'm telling you… not only is he rich, but he's also a stud!" Kagome didn't imagine things; the blond glanced in her direction briefly, before continuing her conversation. "No, I don't think his wife suspects anything; she's pregnant." An eyebrow rose on Kagome's face and she didn't pretend to be listening to the old lady anymore. Instead, she excused herself and approached the secretary's desk.

"I know it's wrong that we work together, and-"

A sudden slap on the table had the woman's deep green eyes collide with Kagome's. A triumphant smirk appeared on her full lips, as if she had the upper hand, as if she knew something Kagome didn't, and she asked in a sugary voice, "Can I help you, Mrs. Taisho?"

How she'd known who Kagome was, was not something hard to grasp, because Kagome was the only _very_ pregnant female to approach Inuyasha's office. No philosophy.

"Aren't you ashamed of yourself?" Kagome asked cryptically before turning around and entering her husband's office without noticing the shocked face of the blond woman. She'd heard the rumors, heard how Kagome had not given her husband the chance to explain himself, and the blond had bet on that tendency in this situation, as well. Unfortunately for her though, Kagome had changed.

She no longer doubted her husband. Until he confirmed something, she didn't believe it.

As it was, Kagome trusted Inuyasha _blindly._

"Sweetheart," he greeted with a dangerous tone and a slight frown, contradicting his own irritation when he let her hug him sweetly and kiss his lips.

"Is it wrong for a wife to miss her husband?" she pouted, crossing her arms and waiting for him to mellow. Instantly, Inuyasha gave in, not wanting to see his pregnant wife sad.

"Fair, but next time wait for me to come home. I'm not gone that much anyway," he said kissing her neck sensually, enjoying this intimacy they could share at any moment of the day. Carefully, he rubbed her swollen stomach, amazed that there was a new life growing inside, a life he'd helped create.

Their child, their second child. He'd love them both the same, there would be no differences, but this one – this one he'd get to see, to raise from the beginning.

"By the way, your secretary is spreading rumors that you two are sleeping together," Kagome announced nonchalantly, as if she were speaking about dinner. Her husband was visibly more alarmed.

"What?"

"That blond outside your door – she's deluded herself into thinking you two have had sex."

"I understood the first time," he glared at her, not appreciating her sarcasm, but instantly froze, feeling apprehensive all of a sudden. Did Kagome believe that woman?

"Kagome, do you… I mean…"

"Of course I don't believe her," she frowned, punching him slightly and smiled when he smiled. "You can keep her, too."

Inuyasha smirked – he liked it so much when she played the boss, as if she could dictate who he should fire and who not.

"Good," he declared, kissing his wife's puffy lips, "because she's really competent."

For a moment he debated whether to come home earlier, but decided there were still a lot of things to do at work before heading back.

"Your daughter sculpted a man today," Kagome giggled, awaiting his outburst, which came instantly.

"She did what?" He was livid, furious, anxious. Having a girl was a real pain, especially when she knew what sex was at seven and when she sculpted _men!_

"You're making a fuss, Inuyasha. It's not that bad." But truly, Kagome couldn't help laughing.

"I love you, woman, but sometimes you're too annoying," he grumbled, thinking of ways to keep Aiko away from boys. And despite her raging hormones, Kagome recognized the warmth in his tone and kissed his cheek.

"I love you more," she declared, not knowing that it still made his heart bounce around inside his chest.

"When is Ayumi due?" Inuyasha asked, changing the subject. It figured that the two best friends would be pregnant at the same time.

"One month after me," Kagome responded, enjoying her husband's comfortable embrace.

"Ha!" he exclaimed proudly. "I was faster!"

Kagome chuckled, amused by his sense of competition. "You've always been faster, Inuyasha. This is your second child, you know…"

"I know woman, shut up," he grumbled, nipping her nape and she shivered deliciously. He smirked, recognizing her needs, but unable to comply just yet.

"Tonight," he promised huskily and she nodded.

"Do you think things will stay the way they are now?" she asked tentatively, the fragility in her tone evident and Inuyasha instantly stilled, knowing exactly what to reply.

"I'll still love you, Aiko will never marry, we will have our little boy-"

"Girl," Kagome interrupted.

"Shut up, woman. As I was saying, we'll have our _boy,_ Sesshomaru will remain the same bastard with a metal pole up his ass-"

"Inuyasha!" Kagome scolded.

"What? It's true! And then Rin will be the same cutie, and yeah, everything's gonna be the same."

He smiled when Kagome snuggled closer to him.

"Inuyasha?" Her eyes were drooping and her husband feared he'd have to take her home with him when he finished his hours.

"Hmm?"

"I'm happy."

He smiled, because he was happy as well, and because everything was now settled for them.


End file.
